09/28/2009

 

 

 

 

I’m feeling better, thank goodness.  I didn’t end up having to get any antibiotics, just drank tons of water, took my cranberry pills and AZO.  I’m still twinging a bit when I pee, but I figure that should disappear soon. 

Unfortunately, now Ben’s sick.    He’s been feverish all day, and he started trying to vomit tonight and fought sleep for quite awhile.  I’m crossing my fingers it’s just his teeth and the runny nose he’s been sporting all day that’s got him out of sorts, because I just can’t deal with another round of sick children right now.  Poor baby’s sleeping now, but just barely.  He’s rolling around and kicking up a lot of noise through the monitor; I don’t expect to get much sleep tonight. 

I’m a little miffed at Aaron.  His friend called and needed him to drive him to the ER (for a twisted knee, of all things), and he just automatically agreed without even asking me.  I mean, we have a sick baby, a two year old who hasn’t slept through the night in about two weeks, a seven year old to get up in the morning for school, and he just volunteers to go spend half the night in the ER for someone who has a wife, family, and other friends to help him out.  I seriously would not have minded at all if Ben wasn’t sick, but what if he really is ill and his fever spikes and I need to take him to the ER?  Am I supposed to drag the other two with me?  And then who’s going to sit in the back with him to make sure he doesn’t aspirate on his vomit? 

I just wish he would have asked, and had the foresight to think ahead. 

I also wish he’d quit acting like he’s the ONLY person Nick has to rely on, when Nick and his wife got along perfectly fine without him up until a year ago. 

I’m trying not to get too bent out of shape about it, just because I don’t want to fight, but we will be having a discussion about it tomorrow.

Despite all of that, he and I are getting along so well that I can hardly believe it.  We’re talking more, spending more quality time together, joking with each other again…a lot of the things that had completely disappeared from our marriage are starting to come back, and I can honestly say we’re both working hard to make sure things stay positive.  We seem to be over the biggest hurdles, but we both agreed that we still need to seek counseling so we can stay on the right track, and also so we have the tools to deal with the upheavals that are happening soon.  Aaron is (hopefully) leaving for school in the next three or four weeks, and that’s going to be a big adjustment.  Plus, we’re still dealing with Jacob and the crap his mom is pulling, too. 

The sex isn’t too bad, either.    But maybe I’m just saying that because I was happy to see the end of the dry spell. 

No, I’m not, although that surely helped.  He just never really understood that I can never have sex just for the sake of having sex.  If all I’m looking for is an orgasm, I wouldn’t bother, because I’ve got a vibrator and I know how to use it.  I need to feel some kind of connection with him to want to have sex with him, and I need to be in the right mood emotionally or he’ll never get me in the right mood physically.  I’m difficult like that;

***

(I went to check on Ben last night, crawled in bed to feed him, and ended up falling asleep. So, everything above the **** was from last night…)

In other news, my school grant check should be here in a week an a half.  It’s about $4,000, and while most of it is already earmarked for paying the bills up through the new year, Christmas, and a few things for my business, I do want to spend about a quarter of it on home improvements.  I did some checking at Home Depot yesterday, and I can either buy a new flat top range/oven combo and a side by side fridge for about $1500, or I can completely gut and redo my master bath for a little over a thousand.  Honestly, I’m not sure which I’d like more.  It would be great to be able to take a bath in my bathroom again, but it would also be great to have an oven that didn’t take an extra half hour to cook everything, and fridge that didn’t have a broken shelf.  A bigger freezer would be a plus, too. 

Honestly, I’m leaning toward the new appliances just because they represent less work at the moment.  I’m betting that when the old, leaky bathtub gets ripped up, half the subfloor in the bathroom is going to need replaced, and that’s a lot of work I don’t have time for at the moment.  Not to mention it’s starting to get colder, and that’s not a good time to be exposing the house to the elements.  And, Home Depot offers free delivery and haul away, so that’s an even bigger bonus. 

And, I could always redo the bathroom with tax money. 

I’m gonna hop off here now.  Gonna see if my check made it to the bank so I can head to town and run some errands.