I Had A Dream

I had a very goofy dream last night. It was about my deceased ex husband. In the dream, some one told me that he wanted to marry me again. I said, "how can that be, when he’s dead ?" The person said, he wasn’t dead. Anyway, I was so excited to be able to see him again & agreed to remarry him. I procedded to get all fancy up, bleached my hair blonde and put on a white skirt. Had on a blue sweat shirt. Wierd combination. Course I looked young & pretty in my dream. Finally got to the church and my deceased parents were there telling me I was a fool for marrying him again. I waited for him to appear, but he never did. Finally the minister came to me & said he was there, drove right into the church in a muddy car. Then left. I ran down the street & found some ppl who knew where he went. I went there & he was just getting off a boat with 2 young pretty girls. He looked different then when I knew him. When he first turned around, his face looked like a devil face. I said u r not H. Won’t print his name. He said it’s me & laughed. Then I saw his beautiful teeth that he always had & I knew it was him. We talked for a bit  it seemed like he was taking off a mask. I asked him why he didn’t stay at the church. He said I was better off without him. I asked him to put his arms around me, which I did & I could feel myself melting into them. I felt at home. Then I asked him to kiss me. He gave me a short peck. I said, " No, I want a long kiss like we used to do." He did that and I just melted again. Then he blew into my right ear which he always did & I loved it, just softly. He remembered that I always liked that. Then we kissed again. I kept telling him to keep kissing me, but he pulled away & said he had to go. I was crying when I woke up, yelling don’t go. Please don’t go. I wanted to go back to sleep & get back into that dream again & never wake up. I could feel his soft lips on mine. I so miss that man. Wonder what this dream means ?  I know I still love & miss him very much. If I could be with him again, it would mean the world to me. I’ve thought about killing myself, but ppl tell me if u do, u don’t go to Heaven. I feel like I’ve been walking around in a fog today. I just can’t forget that dream. Sometimes I feel like it was the real thing and what I’m doing now is a dream. Weird feeling.   Any way, RIP my love, till we meet again. Love u