24 & lost in life

<sigh> i’m depressed big time right now. i always assumed when i was 25 i would have my shit together. i constantly make excuses as to why i don’t have a better education. i am 24 i have a job at a famous catalog make-up warehouse. i am a floor manager, Pretty simple if someone calls in i take over or i put someone in their place i help out when pickers are running slow. all in all it’s ok i get paid 15.50 an hour and i’m up for a raise. I have 2 automoblies. a ford taurus and 200 tahoe. I budget my Money right. i plan to buy a house next year but some how i’m not really Happy. i come home take a shower play with my kid and it starts all over again. A repeated cycle Never ending always dull. yeah my job pays well but it’s not a Job path i want to stay in.. i don’t know what i want as a job. i’m lost. i can’t even begin to know what i want. i’m smart. i know i am but i’m afraid of failing. of letting my self down. i’m afraid of walking into a classroom and being seen as an idiot, of being the idiot of the group.

i’m afriad of not being succesful.

i’m afriad of living the rest of my life un-happy.

i’m afriad of writing another entry like this NEXT YEAR.

I think everybody feels that way, especially around our age. There is so much pressure to establish an amazing life for yourself, and everyone around you always look like they have it all figured out, but don’t worry, you’re not the only person to have ever felt that way.

I’m 26 and just as lost and unhappy, though I see a little clearing through the brush. Only problem is, its something thats very hard to get into.I want to make movies for a living!I just read your first entry as well and it says you like fixing computers. You should seriously think about getting paid for that. It may help you by doing something you really like. If you want to go back to school-

then go for it. Before you know it this time next year is nipping at your heels and you’ll be writing the same type of entry. Time waits for no one and you’re only failing by not trying. Thats why I’m gonna give film a shot, it makes me happy and if I don’t try it now, I’ll be 90 and wondering “what if”. I rambled enough, good luck and I hope you find your way. Take care.

ELF Radio

June 18, 2007

Well, in both of those pics, Christian and Jared lost massive amounts of weight for movie roles. Dangerous, temporary, suffering for their craft.

RYN: Thank you for the note. It was very reassuring. 🙂

RYN:thank you for the compliment 🙂 I too have a fear of failing. Alot of times I’m so afraid of failing that I don’t even try doing things.

thank you for the note 🙂