10/13/2011
I know what you can do to me this is crazy we got three babies and i got all the firends i need. I know it doesnt end right here it took us a couple years but something isnt workin out maybe you should leave my house.
But than when you try and leave it hurts us both you can watch me grieve for this great life i dream this isnt goodbye it seems.
Thinkin back on memories it wasnt even that great it seems, i remember lovin you but i wasnt the one fuckin off on you.
You fucked up and cheated on me broke me down and made me tear than you kicked me on the floor tellin me not to cry no more.
I know this really isnt right seems like i been goin through it my whole life no ones ever treated me right but still i always was alright.
My mom i drank all her beers cause she hit me with chairs she tried to throw me down i guess but that couldnt break me yet.
My ex did the same thing he’d scream at me and beat on me but still i was strong enough i wouldnt let it fuck me up.
But now you see im gettin fucked up worse than when i used to get raped all this pain i could intake you seem like the biggest mistake.
Maybe cause i love you more…but i just cant do it no more…I scream at you to leave my house but i can’t seem to keep you out…
because i always want you right back and you dont have a problem coming back to our family…but maybe its my turn to lean on you.
Get a job pay some of the bills, get a car some driving skills, learn that life is more than beers, learn that family is right here.
But you think im bringing you down and i think your bringing me down it is time to go you know but the same time i cant let you go.
You know its a dillema maybe i dont wana do it alone…maybe you help lots with the girls, they listen better when you’re here.
Do you love me do you mean it before you hit me do you dream it doesnt it guilt you out…thats the lie i tell myself.
The truth is i know your the wrong guy, maybe i am wastin my time, yea i know im livin a lie, and yea i know i dont know why.
Maybe i don’t care cause sometimes we are really good maybe when im not upset ill look into your eyes, pretending its not all lies. Forget about the other guys I know that asked me out sometimes…forget about the scratch and bruises, forget your lips ever told a lie. You do have a good side, and i do have a dark side…maybe im thinkin too much.
But i worked really hard in school, i got everything goin for me…i pay all the bills its my house its my stuff, the kids are mine you got nothin else. So we’ll see what happens when i throw you out cause in the end karmas gona bitch slap you
no doubt