06/04/2013

I want to get me back. The me that once came here to write. The Country Loner that wasn’t except that he wanted to be.

Occasionally a thought comes to my mind about the ‘afterlife’ I ponder on it and of course I always come to the same conclusion that time will tell… or will it? Take my mother’s situation for example. She married my mother at a very young age. They had 3 children before me. Eight months into her pregnancy with me my father killed himself. About three years after I was born my mother married my step father. They had a son. We lived on a small farm and grew up mostly happy and content, certainly lacking for nothing in the way of necessities. My mother’s mother died when she was a very young girl. My brother died when he was only 48. A mother should never outlive a child mama said.

So here is the thing…. when the time comes (if it is your belief) and you are reunited with your loved ones what will you remember? What will you know? Will my grandmother recognize my mother? (Remember mama was a child when grandmother died) Will my mother remember the pain of having lost her eldest son? Will she remember how devastated she was when my father killed himself and left her with 4 kids to raise? Will the love she had for him return or will it be the love of my step-father she remembers?

Yea I know… I think too much about the wrong things. Yes I know that most religions teach that hmmm… mysteries are mysteries and we shouldn’t try to figure them out.

The past
The present
And all the rest…
I hope I remember only the best.

 

NOTE: @k Denotes that the poetry/prose is a "Country Loner" original.