productive

so i have been somewhat productive since i have been home. I managed to get a few loads of laundry done and i cleaned the upstairs bathroom. That one gets used much more often and can get quite dirty. i also chnaged the sheets on the bed and washed those with the towels. i cleaned the bedroom, vaccuumed and dusted and it smells so nice now. i am so happy. i love how nice and fresh the smell of clean can be. i just need to do the downstairs tomorrow at some point and get some bananna bread made for matt. i made mac and cheese for dinner and it came out so damn good. yummy!

i hope to hit up the gym tomorrow with mandy bit we shall see what goes. definately going on monday after therapy.still have a few more days of that to go to.

ok so the fight matt and i had the other night was bad. i mean everytime i ask him to do something he never does it and then he says that he ran out of time.i have gotten to a point that its rediculous. i clean the house for him to dirty it. i let him have his damn tv and all he can do is treat me like crap and make me have to work twice as hard. i dont have hot meals to come home to every night. i dont always feel like cooking when i come home. he was complaining about that. i worked 14 days straight without a day off. when the hell was i supposed to find time to work and cook and go to therapy as well. matt said some very hurtful things and he knew he did. i just wanted to slap him across the face. i know i should accept the fact that he will never change but a little help would be nice.

and i stuck by his side for 5 damns years and i gave up alot and i also supported him every time he changed jobs and now with him wanting to go back to school. its just frustrating and it hurts that he cant give back to me a little. i never ask for much and when i ask for something he gives me a hard time about it. idk what to do anymore. its just to damn frustrating.