Really. Bad. Night.

I haven’t had a night this bad in a few months. I Have slept very little. I wake up and I’m dizzy. My father still isn’t home. And just to top it all off TMI: I’ve got fucking cramps from hell. I swear the earth is going to open up and swallow me soon.

My father has the ability to ruin a perfectly good evening by becoming a perfectly terrible father. He took today off, right? No one knows why. He says it was to go Christmas shopping. I say that’s a big fat lie because my father does all his Christmas shopping on the day before Christmas. Always has, always will. So, he wasn’t as ready to go to sleep at 7:30 as he usually is. So, he gets on his cell phone and starts calling EVERYONE he knows. Eventually he must have found one of his women at home and (really – where the fuck does my father get all his women? I mean… I don’t understand the attraction. He’s an old asshole who does drugs and drinks until he falls down.) came downstairs to tell Julia and I that he was going to The Edgefield Grill, a local restaurant. He wouldn’t be gone but an hour or so.

That… was at NINE P.M. He. is. still. not. home.

I figured he must have just started talking to someone and lost track of time. So I got in bed, started watching The Pirate and fell asleep.

2:30 I woke up and realized he still wasn’t home. Call his cell, no answer. Leave a message. WAit up for an hour. Leave a text message telling him to call home NOW.

Fall asleep again. Wake up at 5. Still. Not. Home.

I know, I KNOW he’s a grown man. I know he’s an adult and he’s allowed to do whatever the fuck he wants. But he has a 13 year old in the bedroom downstairs who’s going to be freaked out that her father isn’t in the house. I don’t know whether I need to start calling hospitals to make sure he wasn’t in a wreck or whether I should call the Sheriff’s Department and see whether he was arrested.

I really hope he wasn’t arrested. I really hope he wasn’t arrested. Gah.

I know in all likelihood he went over to his woman’s house and fell asleep over there. Doesn’t make it any better that he didn’t call and come up with some excuse to make it easier for me to explain to Julia when she wakes up.

I still don’t understand why my mother stayed with him for as long as she did.

It’s going to be a BAD DAY.

Damn it.

I need to go. The dizziness is back and Julia will be up shortly.

I sincerely hope that you all have a better day than I will.

*hugs all around*

My apologies for a stupid father rant. I’m trying to keep them to a minimum. I could do this EVERY DAY.

Much love!