You know…..

ever since Lenox’s birthday Rowen’s been off.  I’ve spent the last three days holding her while she’s crying for Dylan.  I don’t want to prompt her or feed her any emotional baggage but I’d love to know why now.  She’s been having disturbing dreams, they’re kind of the same…it’s Christmas and Santa shows up with Dylan.  Rowen invited them in and the warmth of the house melts them.  Last night was pretty bad and she was up and crying when Jordan got home from Kitchener.  This morning she was already awake when we went to take the dog for a run.  No sooner had we got the dog off her leash when she managed to get hold of a baby bird.  She managed to grab the bird because the bird has an eye infection so bad it has closed the birds eye up.  This drama made Rowen feel worse. I intended to walk through the filed and talk to her about what happened for her last night in the bright light of day.  I figure because of Dylan and Santa being in her dream and both of them representing childhood and a loss of innocence that I could talk to her about how great it is to get older.

Epic fail.

So now Jordan has called in sick, the bird’s in a box beside me, the dog didn’t get a run, I’m waiting on a call to find out where i can send the bird/take the bird for rescue.  Jordan is glued to Rowen and is keeping her spirits up.  I think I’m going to call my shrink when the office opens.  Oh, yeah….and the neighbour’s house is spewing what looks like raw sewage onto my sidewalk.

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August 3, 2010

I think I may have tinkled in your Post Toasties? I sense a little bit of the whip in your treatment for me. I’m not offended, nor on guard, but should I be? I will check and see if psychosis sometimes results in color-blindedness. I don’t remember this color, honestly. As for avoiding my responsibilities, I guess in the realm of possibilities it could exist. I doubt it though.