07/06/2020

Well this has been quite some week. I’ve gone up and down and round like I usually do- still not writing regularly but I’ve got my diet back into line and lost a few pounds so definitely feeling healthier again.

The news this week.. OH MY GOD. It’s been an intense week, I don’t think I’ve ever been as glued to Twitter as I have been the past seven (ten?) days though. The response in the US to George Floyd’s murder has just been phenomenal.. like absolutely so and I’ve just been sitting PRAYING all week that the movement continues as it has been, that the momentum continues and those people out their actively protesting for what is right will carry it through and that their demands are met and George Floyds family see justice for his death. I’m fairly certain that they guy who murdered him had his sentence increased, it was initially 3rd degree murder and I think that’s been changed and upped to represent what actually happened. I think the other three policemen who were there are also now facing similar charges. I must confess I haven’t been following that side of the story as much as I should have done- i’ve more been facsinated by the war happening on Twitter. I’m sure this happens all the time when big events such as this happen, or likely whenever something goes viral, a little while later the other side of the argument rears its head and an opposing or distractionary line crops up.

On twitter, after #BlackLivesMatter went viral, it was then, a couple of days later, whitelivesmatter, alllivesmatter, and a particalarly low point bluelivesmatter although I might have missed the relevance of that one. It makes me so sad, and mad when I see people nit-picking things which are only a method of removing themselves from the debate that is happening, and the significance of what is happening. It’s been clear there’s been a serious problem within the Amercian policeforce for some time- the institutional racism which allows black people to get killed in far, FAR higher proportions that white people by the police- and this has been happening for decades, centuries really. And the fact that the video of George Floyd has him screaing out for help, and stating that he couldn’t breathe. He wasn’t even armed! Like WTF was that police officer thinking, just thinking about it makes me skin crawl and leaves me wanting to punch something. It’s fcking sick, and he must have known (the police officer who was kneeling on his neck) that he could kill him, but he must have believed that he’d get away with it. It’s absolutely sickening. So seeing the BlackLivesMatter movement going for it since then, the number of protests and the ferocity of them, I’m in awe, literally so proud and pleased that they’re happenig.

I wanted to go up to one of the ones in London in the past week- there’s another one happening today outside of the Amercian consulate. I should have gone, I really should have, I feel bad that I didn’t. It just would have been a 3 hour round trip and I would have been on my own.. bleugh though I should have gone. But it’s just so, soooo incredible. I think the reason I really started following it was that a friend of mine put up a meme criticising The actor from starwars, I can’t remember his name, for basically telling people who responded to his words with well don’t all lives matter, aren’t you being racist by making these comments. My friend actually seemed to be sympathising with the people who had left the comments, which imediately started my blood boilding. But since then there has been so much activity on FB, twitter, Instagram of people leaving educational posts explaining why this viewpoint is counterintuitive,

TBH it still makes me mad that so many people would rather fall back into this STUPID nit-picking, but then again who am I to judge. Unfortunately the guy who posted the meme which I saw was an ex, and it used to bug the fuck out of me when we were together that he would rather criticise that respect when people speak out. I feel like him, and people like him are just scared to commit to something, scared to commit to something which is progressive and which leads to an upset of the status quo. It’s just when they started to leave comments such as “well don’t all lives matter”? that my blood really starts to boil. Of course he wasn’t saying all lives don’t matter, but the context for this moment in time and this movement is specifically black lives matter!! gawd it makes me so angry. And I think as several times this week I’ve read posts and just been so saddened that a really important, serious, movement might lose momentum because of idiots who can’t think outside of their own box. People who say, oh but don’t hate, and hate is bad and anyone stating that blacklivesmatter is being racist.. dear GOD.

But the movement hasn’t lost momentum, thank GAWD, and there have been so many movements and people who have been fighting back and trying to educate in context and also about the severity of what this movement is about. IT’s warms my heart so much to see these educational messages going out, and that people are writing things and doing things to show people that stating that blacklivesmatter is NOT stating that all lives don’t matter. But also messages along the lines that if the looting of shops angers you more than the death of an unarmed black man, then you maybe need to do some thinking. Lol I think that my ex also used to take the, all lives matter, don’t show solidarity for any specific cause, argument, all in the effort to keep the peace. Used to drive me mad because it’s so unbelievably naive. I feel slightly lighter this week, remembering that there are millions, and millions of people out there who feel like I do and know that to really affect change you have to fight for it. I’m washing away his influence.

So.. this week has been mad, and I did actaully have to spend a day away from the computer and my phone, and more specifically news outlets on Friday because I was getting too emotional.

I PRAY, PRAY PRAY PRAY that ths movement comtinues and that justice is gained for George Floyds family and all the others who have been murdered by the institutionally racist police.

#BlackLivesMatter

#ChangeIsPossible