Job Hunting & Binge Eating

Oops, I let a little time between entries slip by but life feels as though it’s at a bit of a standstill at the moment so there’s nothing too thrilling to write about. But also, isn’t the point of diary to write about anything and everything – even the seemingly unimportant?

I’ve been searching and searching for jobs the last few days, to no avail. There’s just nothing around at the moment and it’s so frustrating! I can’t possibly read anymore job listings telling me that even though I have a degree and several years experience in the field, I don’t have enough years and the specific experience they want. What’s a girl to do?! So I apply for the jobs anyway in hopes that they’ll notice the pure desperation coming off my cover letter and just hire me out of pity, despite the lack of experience.

I house/dog sat for a few days last week for a family friend and it was nice having the whole place to myself but also made me a little worried for when I finally move out of my parents house (in approx. ten thousand years at this rate). When left to my own devices, I really just get bored, and boredom always leads to binge eating. It’s disappointing because I was doing decently well with keeping my food under control but then Friday night came around and I ended up eating way, way too much Indian food. Like, a gross amount. And then Saturday afternoon it only got worse with potato chips, ice cream (the protein kind but I don’t think it remains healthy if you eat a whole pint), and then fish and chips for dinner. I struggle so much with restraint, food is such a comfort, and when there’s no one around to witness what I consume it just gets so much worse. Afterwards, the guilt drives me crazy because I’m not uneducated on health and nutrition – I know exactly what I should be eating and how much so when I blatantly ignore that for a binge session, it just horrifies me, truly. At least while I’m living at home there’s always people around and it usually – definitely not always – stops me from going too nuts on the food. I’m so weak, it’s unbelievable really.

Time for bed, I think.  Day off tomorrow so will hopefully get a little sleep in!

Ashleigh