Father’s Day

 Happy Father’s Day to anyone who still reads this and is a dad doing it all, mom doing it all, or a dad sharing equal responsibilities. 

Five years ago today, I was either at work or at the hospital. It was not a good time for me, but I didn’t know. My dad was in the hospital to have a routine surgery but on this evening, I had been notified at some point that my dad had developed MRSA of the brain and was not going to recover. 

Long story short: I miss him. I miss his voice. I don’t remember it. I miss his smell…he smelled so good all the time. I will admit that last year was so much harder. Dealing with amnesia and re-living his death in a manner was so much harder. I’m a stronger man than I was last year and I’m disassociating the date with what happened to my dad and when. It’s not a day. He just simply died. It’s a fact of life. Just doesn’t change the fact that I miss him. I don’t feel as responsible as I did last year and probably for the first three years after his death. 

i love you, Pops.