double sided love connections

"You are the candle, love’s the flame. A fire that burns through wind and rain" 

     I once wrote about living life by a candle. The candle was the stick that captured feelings for the one I love, the flame represented the light in which kept us alive, and the kerosine that filled my life caused the explotion that ended up extinguishing us.

Now, after sustaining the distance from the only one I ever loved, I was forced to see outside of this light. I”ve experienced things in the last couple years that have made the journey away from this light easier, yet concurrently complicating my feelings that will never be blown out. 

Through all this I have come to conclusions about love, about loss, through trial and error, that of which have perilously opened my once closed eyes to the world…or rather to those others that make up the world outside of the candle lit room. I have tried to ignore and parry my feelings for others for I knew they would only emphasize the already strong state of bewilderment that engulfs me at times. Could dodging these feelings only be ways I chose to avoid getting burned, to advert what had previously scarred me, but only to circle back to its original state? A state, now, that seems the same, yet the differences are alarming. What I am really getting at, the point I am trying to not only answer myself, but questioningly plea to others, is there such thing as a double-sided-love-connection without hurt? Do circumstances like this actually exist? Is hurting the ones you love so inevitable because of choices you make that you end up losing everything?

What about polygamy? Is it possible for polygamy to serve as a means to preserve the feelings of others at risk of being hurt? I mean, can you find happiness in more than one individual since we as human beings are comprised of so much. There is a reason the divorce rate is higher than staying married in this country. We, as dynamic and frequently ambiguous people, find it difficult to faithfully and permanently pin our lives onto the wall of another person. For this reason, polygamy might be considered an option despite its illegality. However, taking polygamy to a less serious level of togetherness with more than one person in a "unmarried situation," the similarities still remain.

  For now, whatever road I chose, whoever I end up with, or whichever priorities lighten the way to another candle, I will never forget the ones that remain molded together even against the omnipotent difficulties that love  (the flame) raditates…        

"Shine your light on this heart of mine
Till the end of time
You came to me like the dawn through the night
Just shinin’ like the sun
Out of my dreams and into my life
You are the one, you are the one"