Didn’t Leave Off Anywhere and It’s been Years

I haven’t written on this site in a very very long time.  So much of my life is different than the last time I wrote.  So much of my life is different since the last time I even blogged on any site.  My daughter and I are estranged, she is 18 years old now… she was diagnosed with conduct disorder at 15 and judge me if you wish but she became a danger to us and her brother and I terminated my rights.  She came back to us but only for a short time and during that time she swore she’d changed and as a loving mother I wanted to believe it, until she started wreaking havoc with her brother’s life (social as well as at home), telling lies about her grandmother (who was her guardian until she demanded to come live with me again though she claimed my mother threw her out–I might be estranged from my family of origin but I don’t believe my mother is that callous).  She’s still on the internet (my daughter) telling vile lies about me, my husband, her brother, her grandmother, her aunt…anyone that’s crossed her.  So we’ll leave it at that.

I’m still married to my husband, going on 16 years now.  Our son is going to be 15 in September (I started on Open Diary the year after he was born, if you can believe that).  We have two cats and a dog.  I don’t know if anyone will remember me and remember my cat Aslan.  We’ve had him since 2008 and adopted him when he was 4 years old.  He is in the final stages of life.  We know he is going to leave us soon and he is such a special cat.  We also have a very chunky Korat mix kitty named Freya… we’ve had her since she was 2 and adopted her in 2012.  And last year we adopted a very special dog we named Bailey.  He was on our local shelter’s kill list.  He is the most non aggressive, sweetest, most chicken shit dog I have ever met and he thinks he’s a lap dog… believe me he isn’t.  I’m not sure if I can post pictures, I don’t have nor can I afford a subscription right now.

I am a disabled veteran….when I first started writing here I was in the USAF…. now I’m going to the VA for my medical care (and that’s a joke).  I have PTSD, anxiety and depression.

I know there was all kinds of drama years ago when I invited my sister on this site…and then all hell broke loose there.  But she can’t even keep up with the blog she has elsewhere…not that I look anymore.  My nephew likely doesn’t even remember me… all my family got ripped to shreds because of my daughter… Even my middle sister is frayed from the rest of the family now. Same reason… Conduct disorder, ODD… she had both.

We bought our first home in 2015 and we love it.  We love being near the coast, we love the beach, the aquarium…. so much.

I stopped blogging on the site that went up before OD shut down.  And I use an app to create art mostly.  I’m not on social media (AT ALL).  I’m too old for drama.

My inlaws, I think I would talk about them frequently.  My MIL has dementia and is in a nursing home.  My husband calls her several times a week to talk to her.  She often asks about past events and when they happened and often repeats the same questions but my husband has immense patience with her.  My FIL passed away in November of 2013 from metastatic prostate cancer.  He was a true father figure to me and we spent every weekend visiting him in the nursing facility until he passed.  We miss him dearly.

I don’t remember anyone I used to talk to on here.  So let’s start fresh.  I’m old enough now to know not to give out real names….or actual locations (not that it matters, my estranged family including my daughter, knows where I live).  My parents have driven by my house.  But I’m going to get back to my Color Therapy app and TV.  My weekends are only so long.  Welcome Back Open Diary….and hopefully I’ll make new friends on here… since I can’t remember any of the old ones…

I think my life has improved. My son wants to be a meteorologist and is super weather savvy.  It is so hard to believe that he even had a speech delay when he was younger.

My husband is so sweet and understanding and has never been afraid to show emotion. I think his father’s passing brought us closer.

Aslan in his long life has been a very special cat, he is the absolute only cat my FIL ever liked let alone loved. He asked about “his kitty” so much the nursing home thought he had a cat. He stayed with us briefly in the summer of 2013, we didn’t know he was dying of cancer, and it was trying but I am so glad we did it now looking back.

We still wish he were with us. My FIL You could always ask him anything cause he always seemed to have the right answer, we wish he had told us about the cancer but we know why he didn’t.

i think that is all I have, I haven’t written in forever.

Peace, Love and Harmony.

RH.