Prelude to a Prequel

I’ve been watching a ton of movies lately.  I dunno why, exactly.  Just having the mood hit me right, I guess.  There’s nothing quite as nice as having fuckloads of movie channels to pick from.  There’s always something on, and if you miss a good one, it’ll be on again later about four times.  Good times!

For some short reviews…

Alexander (Director’s Cut):  I watched this one on a recommendation from Will (and, yes, I’ll get to him and Mo later).  He said it was good and that he couldn’t understand why no one liked it.  Well, I didn’t like it, but I’m not sure why no one else did.  I didn’t like it because I know the story of Alexander.  The story and the legends, both.  No three hour movie can do it justice.  The man just accomplished too much in his life.  You’d need something more like a ten hour mini-series.  Or a Lord of the Rings style trilogy.  But not a single three hour movie.  And why were all the Macedonians speaking in some kind of Irish-Scottish-Generally British accent?  Why couldn’t Val Kilmer keep his accent from fading in and out?  And why was Angelina Jolie speaking in a Russian-Slavic-Germanic accent?  And why was she playing Colin Farrell’s mother?  Just generally not a good movie in the least.

Exorcist:  The Beginning:  In the first Exorcist movie, other priests speak of Father Merrin’s encounter with the demon Pazuzu in Africa in his youth, noting that it "damn near killed him."  Exorcist:  The Beginning is supposed to be the story of this encounter.  But at no time in this movie does Merrin come close to death.  And the exorcism itself takes less than five minutes.  Hardly the grueling encouter that dialogue would infer.  This turned into your basic Vatican conspiracy movie, with the church having locked away all knowledge of an out-of-place church in the middle of Africa.  The only cool part was that the demon inhabited the church, which was built on the spot because it was believed to be where Lucifer fell to Earth from Heaven.  That’s an awesome idea…but otherwise the movie sucked much ass.

Elephant:  I’m reluctant to blast this movie.  It was terrible, make no mistake.  But it was an experiment mostly.  It’s kind of a "a day in the life" kind of thing about a high school massacre (read:  Columbine).  But the characters the director (Gus Van Sant) chooses to follow around are meaningless.  Just faces in the soon to be slaughtered crowd.  Their existence has zero meaning in the story.  And the two kids who do the killing?  There’s no reasons given as to why they do it.  Or details of their planning.  You just see them shooting guns at a woodpile, playing video games, showering together, then shooting up the school.  I guess what I’m complaining about here is that there’s no insight…no delving into the psyche of these characters.  A waste of time, basically.

Superman the Movie:  Ah, now here was an awesome one.  Given that it was made a few years before I was born (1978), the special effects are quite impressive.  Of course, by today’s standards, they’re bad, but still…believeable enough.  Gene Hackman proves why he was The Man in those days by being awesome as Lex Luthor.  Christopher Reeve brings real life and contrast to Clark Kent/Superman.  Margot Kidder is…passable…as Lois Lane.  The movie kind of lost me at the end, though.  Reversing the spin of the Earth makes time go backwards?  Um…no.  I can suspend disbelief enough to see a man fly, but turning back time like that?  No.  Awful.  Truly awful.  The Earth would just explode.  The end.  But oh, well.  I can forgive that because the rest of the movie was awesome.

Ying Xiong:  Many of you may know this movie as Hero.  Actually, many of you may not know this movie at all.  And that’s a shame.  It has become my favorite movie ever made.  Yes, I said that.  Better than Ghostbusters.  Better than Chasing Amy.  Better than anything else.  The movie touts Jet Li as its star, but really, it’s director Yimou Zhang.  He creates a world of unparalleled beauty through the use of colors, timely slow motion, and some of the most breathtaking landscapes I’ve ever seen.  It would be easy to dismiss as simply a kung-fu movie, but that would be an unfair assessment.  It’s a tale of lies, betrayal, ambition, idealism, and a love that death can’t even stop.  Jet Li is passable as Nameless, but it is Maggie Cheung (Flying Snow) and Tony Leung (Broken Sword) that steal the show.  Their performances as the lovers/team of assassins can’t really be described.  You believe their every word, even in the flashbacks that aren’t fully the truth.  Basically, just a brilliant, beautiful movie.  I’ve seen it probably fifty times, including averaging about twice a week for the last month.  Seriously, I’ve watched it that much.  It hasn’t gotten old yet, either.  That’s one of the best things I can say about a movie.

Now Playing in Dave’s Mental Jukebox:  "Wasteland" by 10 Years, "Fully Alive" by Flyleaf, "Vivica" by Jack Off Jill, and "Tell Me Why" by Cold

So now then…

Of course, the last time I wrote in here, I was distraught in pretty much every sense of the word.  I had just found what I think is proof that my best friend and ex-girfriend are together.  After I let it stew up in my head for a few days, I realized I just didn’t care as much as it had seemed.  Or, to be more accurate, I was glad to know one way or the other rather than being left to wonder.  It didn’t matter quite as much that they are, indeed, together…just so long as I knew something.  That may not sound sensical, but it’s true.

But let me get a few things straight here.  I still hate (and I don’t use that word lightly here) her.  Not necessarily that she’s with him, but just that it seems to affirm to me all I feared she felt, or more accurately didn’t feel, about me.  That I gave her so much, only to have her like someone else better.  Pisses me off.  As for him…well…I don’t plan on letting him get off free and clear on it.  No, I haven’t confronted him yet.  There’s a good reason:  He’ll be coming home for a visit next month.  He has no idea that I know anything, so why do I have to confront by phone immediately, when I can gladly sit on it until he comes home and confront him face to face, man to man, eye…to…eye.  I want to make him look me in the eye and tell me what’s going on.  That’s worth more to me than anything I could do over the phone.  But that’s just me.

And so, with that, I close up shop for a bit.  Friday afternoon, I’m off to Columbus and Cleveland for the weekend.  The main reason for going is to see the Browns vs. Titans on Sunday, but I also get to see Jason and Jenny (the rarely seen brother-sister combo) this weekend, too.  Not to

mention just getting a vacation, any vacation.  I sorely need one.  I shall return with some semblance of a full report Monday evenin’.  Until then………I’unno.  Entertain yourselves for a change.  Sheesh.

Sayonara.