A Cascading Trilogy of Blunders

I knew, 100%, that I was asking for it today.  I was so sure, that I said it out loud after I left work today.  Which, of course, means it happened.

After absolutely busting my hump at work all week, including working plenty more hours than scheduled for, I decided I would cut out thirty minutes early today.  As I walked to my car, I said to no one in particular, "This is going to come back to bite me today.  Watch me end up getting pulled over for my tags."  Meaning, I’ve been driving around on expired tags since the end of March.  Sure enough, about half way home, two cars duck out from behind me right before I reach a red light and reveal a Sumner County Sheriff.  This just after I said, "Please don’t let there be a cop behind any of these cars should they decide to switch lanes."  I’m psychic, I swear.  I was hoping he wouldn’t notice, considering one or two others have failed to notice, despite being behind me at red lights for upwards of a minute.  But he did.  I think it might’ve been my quick darting over into the right lane that drew his attention.  Made it look like I had something to hide.  And so, I was indeed pulled over and given a ticket for $148.  Ouch.

But wait, there’s more!

Proving I never should’ve left the house today, I ate dinner with Will’s parents tonight (yes, I drove over there later on, still with expired tags…I never claimed to be a genius…well…not today anyway).  While doing so, I chipped a tooth.  How the fuck does someone chip a tooth on soft food like soggy texas toast or hamburger steak?  I’m living proof that it can be done.  Fortunately for me, it’s a tooth in the back.  In fact, it’s the one right in front of the crown I have.  What is it with me and the bottom left side of my mouth?  Weak ass teeth!  Considering I have zero insurance and not enough money to pay for any solutions right now, the tooth is staying as it is.  Just have to be careful not to make it worse somehow.  As if I even know how…

And, to complete the trifecta…

I took my lunch break at work today just to get a quick snack.  I paid 75 cents for a candy bar in the vending machine, which is a total rip off.  Charging employees the same as customers?  Unheard of!  Anywho…  I should’ve guessed trouble was coming when I felt a lot of heat emanating from the machine itself, but thought nothing of it until I opened said candy bar.  Oh..My…Gawd…   It was melted all to hell and looked like and honest to goodness turd.  I wanted to eat this thing so badly, but everytime I picked it up, I just kept thinking it looked like a damn turd.  So I ended up throwing it away, completely uneaten.

Of course, in retrospect, I’d be doing fantastic if that was the worst thing that happened to me all day.

Now Playing in Dave’s Mental Jukebox:  "Stricken" by Disturbed, "The Imperial March" conducted by John Williams, and "One Love" by Hootie and the Blowfish

Hopefully I’m done getting shit on for the month…or year (though I know that’s too much to ask).  I should just start walking around with an umbrella, bracing for whatever inevitable shitstorm will be coming next.

And I think I’ll just cut this off right here before something else goes wrong.  It’s just one of those days.

Sayonara.