Cat on Crack

Apparently this weekend my cat went insane. He’s normally a little off….which is why I love him…but this weekend he was just downright satanic.

Saturday:

Spent the day with Beth at her graduation. Left Paco out with Molly, normally they are fine….

Came home around 3pm.

My plastic bowls and random things like coozies that usually live on top of the fridge were in the floor. My glass vase was leaning precariously between the wall and the fridge.

My big metal old antique poster …

…that is normally NAILED to the wall because…well it’s a huge metal sign….was HANGING OFF THE WALL BY ONE NAIL….

And my wardrobe doors were open and my clothes were thoroughly cat-furred.

And for some reason I let him live.

Sunday:

Spent Saturday night at mom’s because I felt sick. Came home sunday morning…

He knocked. My filing cabinet. Over.

It’s just a small two drawer one but still….

And then…he went into the kitchen…and opened the HUGE cabinet door…and got in the bottom shelf where I keep the pots and dirt from the plants he murdered for later use. So he got one out….and proceeded to get the dirt OUT of the pot…and dance in it.

And then he got on the counter…and opened the cabinet door where the dishes are….because I guess he got hungry.

So then he went in my bathroom and overturned the trash can and played with the contents.

And then he topped it all off by partially shredding a roll of toilet paper.

So after I’d cleaned up all his messes…I was standing at the kitchen sink doing dishes on Sunday…and I thought to myself "Funny, I don’t remember hitting my shin on the cabinet when I stand here….why does it feel like the cabinet keeps hitting me…I’m not moving am I???"

So I look down.

And there’s the furry little jackass between my legs trying to get the freaking cabinet open and looking pissed because I am blocking his efforts inadvertently with my shin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I almost drownd him.

So…does anyone want a cat?

(Back to work now, exam on Wednesday, then we can relax….for a minute.)