Wednesday

My sleep schedule has been all shot to hell (along with my new exercise regimin) because of this cold. Slept till after noon today. And of course that means I have trouble falling asleep at night. Perhaps I could ask A. to hit me on the head with a hammer.

In any case, I had Lady K., who is home on vacation, to play with. We went to Karen’s Consignment and bought Lady K two suits (each with a pair of pants and a skirt) and me a long lovely lightly shaped gray jacket for 55.00 altogether! Lady K. has applied to Teaching Across America (I am refusing to think of my poor baby in some classroom where kids are hanging each other on the hanging lamps and slipping crack vials in her lunch bag when she isn’t looking) and they’ve called her back for a second interview, so she thought she should have a suit. She agreed with me that a suit is a good idea, not only for interviews but also for classrooms, because when you are 21 you want to do anything you can to look older if you need to get people to obey you.

Oh it was fun trying clothes on her. The saleslady had a field day picking things out. Lady K is my height, around 5’9″, with a tiny waist. It turns out she fits in size 4. (I do think they’ve redone sizes since I was her age. I too was skinny, but I was never a 4). Lady K. doesn’t like people spending money on her, but a DKNY suit for $18.00 was acceptable.

Then we went to Sam’s Club. A. usually is the one to do the Sam’s Club trips, so I looked around with interest as Lady K filled up her cart with stuff to take back to her place at school. I found yeast–a shitload of it–and since I am in the mood to bake bread these days I took a chance (after checking the use by date) and bought it.

Then I dropped her off at the bus to go to NY to see her friend Olga. Her dad and Ben will meet her tomorrow and do fun things. I relaxed and started a knit hat for her boyfriend, only it turned out to be too small so I will make another one tomorrow.

This morning (well, early this afternoon) when we were getting our breakfasts, I said “well, here is my view on Joel. I’m not happy about him as a lifetime companion for you because he’s anti intellectual, has no education, is very stubborn in the way some men are (do stupid things that hurt themselves like not pay taxes, etc). On the other hand, I got to know him better over Christmas and as a person, not as someone who can affect your life, I find him sweet and liked him very much.” She grinned and said “I feel the same way.” She asked how I’d feel if he changed, and although inside I had that shrinking feeling one has when the words “he’ll change” are ever uttered, I said “of course.” And it turns out that she did explain to him why he really ought to do his taxes, and the fact that he got 800.00 back has inspired him to do his 2006 taxes as well.

In any case, it looks as though they will come here after school ends, which makes me happy. She visited her therapist at school to talk about how unnerved she is about graduating, with no idea what she wants to do when she grows up, and out of their discussion she emerged with the idea that one thing that she doesn’t have to change at this time is her home. So she would like to come back here.

She asked me the first day she got back if Joel could move in here with her. A. was there, but as soon as she said that he said “WELL, I GUESS I’LL GO DO THE GROUT IN THE BATHROOM.” For months I had been saying that I didn’t want a boyfriend living here, but after a minute I said yes.

So a day later, I was just parking my car after a teaching stint when A. came running out of the house to warn me that Lady K. and Ben were laughing hysterically because Ben had just told her that I’ve been declaring for months that no boyfriend would come to live in my house.

So, today at Sam’s Club I told her I knew that Ben had told her about that. She had just told me that she was looking into summer sublets in the area, because all the Rutgers students will be going away. She grinned again and said, well, could he stay for the “inbetween part of may, when I’m going on vacations and stuff and don’t want to pay rent for a place I won’t be in?” And I said of course. When push comes to shove, I found, I’m a softy. I just want my kid nearby. I did say to her, though, “he needs to earn you.” And she said “I know.”