2008 in Review

1.What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
I had a full calendar year of being in a relationship.  I went to my first college party, complete with booze, and drank none of it.  I became a math minor.  I moved back in with my parents over the summer.  I paddled in a kayak down a river.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I can’t recall making any resolutions last year, though I suppose I may have just carried them over from years past.  I didn’t smoke any marijuana, though I did get drunk once, on purpose.  It was on Thanksgiving, though, and with my family, and I very much DID NOT go over the top with it, so I’m fine with it.
My resolution for this next year is to find an appartment, and live in it, and be happy.  There will be no more of this living with my parents crap.  It just drives me too insane to be around my family like that.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Hana’s stepdaughter gave birth, so she’s a grandma now!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
2007 was a year of close, personal deaths, 2008 one for celebrities.  I have to admit, however selfish, I’d much rather have the celebrities die.

5. What countries did you visit?
I did not leave the country this year.  My funds are far too depleted from the Europe trip to try another one.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Stability.  I had a huge regression over the summer, when I moved back in with my parents, and I’ve been quite mentally unstable for most of the year following that.  I’ve almost finally caught up to where I was pre-summer, though still not quite.  I’d like to get back to being a functioning human being.

7. What date(s) from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
May 24th, my awesome birthday and Amanda H’s wedding (which made many people late to my party, which is why I remember it), August 2nd, my one year anniversary with Bryan, August 13th, Bryan’s birthday, and December 27th, Maggie and Bronsen’s 25th year anniversary (Bryan’s parents), on which they had a huge party, and I cooked food with the rest of their family for not only that whole day, but most of the two weeks preceding it.  So.  Much.  Food.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Surviving it all?  This has been a year of personal hell, and I got through it, relatively unscathed, somehow.  I’ve always been a survivor, but this year definitely tested my limits.  I’m glad that I’ve come out still alive, still with a wonderful relationship, still in school, still with friends…  This is good.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not coming out ahead.  Maturity-wise, emotional health-wise, physical health-wise, intellectually…  it is all worse than where I was last year.  I have learned numerous lessons, which will indeed make up for this eventually, but it’s been such slow progress.  It’s frustrating.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Nothing terribly serious.  I either had very minor mono or a very serious cold that took me out of class for a week, but it didn’t hurt my school work at all, and I got over it very successfully.  I currently have bronchitis, but it’s healing very quickly, and it should be completely gone by the end of the week, methinks.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
I paid for my portion of a river trip with Bryan and with many of our friends.  I’ve been very frugal with money this year, and most of it has gone to groceries, so aside from the odd date, that’s easily the best (and most expensive) part of my monetary year.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Oh God:  Bryan’s.  I don’t know anyone else who could not only have dealt with all of my issues this year, but done it calmly, collectedly, and not come out any the worse for it.  This boy has kept me alive and sane, and I love him for it.  Wholeheartedly.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
That would be mine.  I have let myself stew, and I have let myself fall.  I have not tried nearly as hard as I could to be a better person, and I have not pursued very many things outside of my comfort zone.  This has changed in the last month:  I have been making leaps and bounds as far as self-improvement; but for the majority of the year, my behavior has been awful.

14. Where did most of your money go?
To my savings account, and to food.  This has been my thriftiest year.  If I don’t absolutely need it, I don’t buy it.  My savings account went from one to three digits, though.  I’m pretty proud of that.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The river trip down the Green River, Maggie and Bronson’s party (mostly for being so included in their family; it’s kind of weird, but I often feel closer to Bryan’s family than to my own), Sarah coming home from New York (Silly girl spent a whole semester "abroad" without me, having adventures all by herself and everything.  Now we can have adventures together again!)  Bryan and I plan to move in together at the end of the Spring semester, along with Katrina (my current dorms roommate) and potentially Ian (Katriana’s boyfriend of over a year)–  I’ve been pretty excited about moving in.  Also:  puppies!  They are so fucking cute!

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Queen and David Bowie’s Under Pressure.  Not only did I fall in love with this song, but it is strangely applicable to my life this last year.  (Not in the relationship breaking sense– more in the "my world is falling apart" sort of metaphorical sense.)
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Worse off, as mentioned above.  The good news:  I’m almost back to where I was, and I know that I’ll be making leaps and bounds really soon, to wind up where I would’ve been without the regression, but with the benefit of some otherwise difficult-to-come-by life lessons.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Caring about myself.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Taking Bryan for granted.  He is by far the most amazing person in my life.  I very rarely took him for granted, but I wish I hadn’t done it at all.  He is the most important part of my life right now, and I am so very grateful for that.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
Trapped in southern Utah with my family.  Maggie’s party rescued me.

21. Who deleted question 21?
Deleted?  It’s obviously still there!  I’m answering it!

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
I fell in love with Bryan in 2007, but indeed, I have done much more so in the last year.

23. How many one-night stands?
I have been completely faithful the whole year.  I am proud to say that this number is zero.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Considering that I don’t have a TV anymore, I couldn’t rightly say.  Actually, I did torrent a lot of Weeds…  So that would have to be it.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Still don’t really have a policiy of hate.  If anything, I’m much more forgiving of the people that I have disliked in the past.  (I guess that’s at least one step in the right direction, eh?)

26. What was the best book you read?
Oh, Sweet Jesus.  If this was a year of insanity, it was also a year of books.  I swear I was reading between a book a week and a book a day.  By coincidence, most of this was also Victorian literature.  What a hard choice!  I will give the award to The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde.  Also, I reread The Farthest Shore, by Ursula K. LeGuin, which reevaluated my views on death.  This book takes second.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Vienna Teng.  I am a sucker for musical artists with pianos.  And she can sing.  Beautifully.  Go.  Listen.  Now!

<fontface=”Verdana, Arial” color=”#000000″ size=”2″ arial=””>28. What did you want and get?
Bryan, Bryan, and, uhhhh, Bryan…  I am so glad that he’s seen me through this year.  We have grown nothing but closer, though there has been a lot of strain on our relationship.  I am so lucky that he is committed to keeping us in tact, and that he will always be there for me.

29. What did you want and not get?
I can’t remember if I said it earlier or not, but this has been a very materialistic year for me, so… a lot.  It is a current goal of mine to lose the materialism, so that’s as much as I’m going to say here.  Happy new year, everybody!  Whee!  *Throws confetti to distract you*

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
I have not been to the movies very much this year.  I have not had a lot of money.  I watched Finding Nemo quite a bit (it is still my favorite movie), so I’m going to say that it is my favorite film of the year.  I love the messages it has about family, about childhood, about letting go, and about being yourself.  It’s everything that I belive and strive to achieve.  And it’s just so goddamnned happy– how can you not love it?

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Well, I turned 19, and I had a party at the park.  Mostly I just chilled with my friends, and they all brought food– lots and LOTS of food.  So we ate.  And played tag.  And talked.  And it was absolutely fantastic.  My birthdays are always awesome.  Bryan made ice cream cake.  And we ate that too, even though it kind of melted.  It was delicious.

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Either not so much sanity loss, or not so much being tight on cash.  But since I’m not being materialistic anymore (remember?)  I’ll have to say the sanity loss.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
If it doesn’t have holes, it’s definitely wearable.

34. What kept you sane?
Bryan, and my very close friends.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Oh gosh, I seriously haven’t had a lot of attraction for people other than Bryan.  Maybe Cate Blanchett.  Especially as a redhead.  MmmMmmm.  (Also, I just looked her up to make sure that I spelled her name correctly–  did you know that she’s 49 years old?  She does NOT look it.)

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
I feel kind of lame saying "The Presidential Election," but it’s true, though not in the typical sense.  I got incredibly frustrated with the US’s bipartisan system, and got very angry that there was no in-between setting.  You are either voting strong-right-republican (with Palin, who is TeRrIfYiNg– terrifying enough to use alternating CaPs), or I’m-a-liberal-but-comprimising-my-own-beliefs-to-get-votes.  Blah.  I didn’t vote for either.  Not that it really matters in Utah, anyway…  Stupid electoral college.  That is the other political issue.  Grr.

37. Who did you miss?
I learned to let go of those who have moved on from my life, without any hurt, or misunderstanding.  I have many friends that I will probably never see again, and I’m finally okay with that, because I know that they are out in the world, making a new life for themselves, and ENJOYING it.  That being said,  I quite missed Sarah.  She is by no means out of my life, and is easily my best friend after Bryan.  It was hard having her all the way in New York, and I’m glad that she’s back.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
I met three significant people this year, all through the worst class in the entire world (Quantitative Analysis– I promise it’s EVEN MORE BORING than it sounds):  Alex, Chase, and Max (in alphabetical order).  They’re all fantastic, and I would consider each to be a good friend.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Oh goodness, I’ve learned quite a bit.  But let’s just be as cliché as possible:  I learned to believe in myself.  To know that I can make improvement, and to take that improvement, however impossible it seems.  I know that I can do this, and I can do it by myself.  (Though help definitely is nice).

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
It’s the terror of knowing
What this world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming ‘Let me

out’
Pray tomorrow – gets me higher high high
Pressure on people – people on streets

Turned away from it all like a blind man
Sat on a fence but it don’t work
Keep coming up with love
but it’s so slashed and torn
Why – why – why ?
Love love love love love

Insanity laughs under pressure we’re cracking
Can’t we give ourselves one more chance
Why can’t we give love that one more chance

~From Under Pressure, by Queen and David Bowie