Almost Time To Go

 (My Dearest Readers,
This is my attempt at a bit of writing.
Let me know if you read it.
Let me know what you think.
It would mean a lot to me.
Here we go.)

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

Almost Time To Go

 I am tempted to put things for you in between all of the lines but I’m going to be nice.

Time, Time, Time.
I can’t help but hold on to all that time is.
I don’t have enough of it today.

In an hour everything will be exactly the same, yet somehow different.
A passing thought that I can’t let go of.
I wonder if anyone will notice. 

I feel better knowing that there is still a little bit of time left,
Even if it goes unnoticed by everyone.
Some part of me is breaking.

 Wait, Though, That doesn’t make sense.
If nothing is going to change in an hour,
Then why is there any problem? 

The answer?
Because it makes me feel better to know the truth of closeness
Than the fear of distance.

 I remember the child-like innocence of crying whenever a family member came for a visit and then left.
The overwhelming feeling of already missing them.
The fear that this may be the last time even before knowing what death is.

Before death ruled bits of my everyday life.
Before time was even a thought in my mind.
The innocence of "I miss you

, I wish you could stay a while longer."

 Stalling as long as I can to make you stay
Though, knowing that you have to leave now.
There hasn’t really been enough time.

 The silent tear stains of "I don’t want you to go" come in to play where no one can see.
It isn’t going to be long before we speak again
Yet somehow I feel better when you are closer.

Twenty minutes is better than three hours.
I’m not quite ready for this yet.
A little less than an hour from now.

I hope you don’t forget the promises we share or the bond that lays before us.
This is a fleeting thought that I can’t let go of.
Could it be a fear? 

Maybe fear does play a part.
It feels as though a part of me is being taken away from me.
An overly attached reaction to you leaving.

I shouldn’t be this upset, really.
It’s not like you will be gone forever.
Just for a little while. 

Still, Though. I’m running out of time.
43 minutes.
Not enough time.

I suppose this is my overreaction to being a too-close and clingy kind of friend.
That’s how I think most people see this anyway.
It isn’t going to be long, after all. 

You don’t even have to be with me.
Just knowing that you are close

by helps so much.
I hold you so high.

This is the same way I would feel back then.
I remember 13 years old locking myself in my room after they left
Pretending that I was just going to go do something like nap or write.

 In truth I had to hide my tears.
I thought that I would grow out of it
But I guess I never did. 

I thought I could leave this kind of feeling behind me
And just be okay with the fact that sometimes people are close to me
And sometimes they are farther away.

In short, I don’t want you to leave yet.
I want to waste a little more of your time forgetting the worries
And getting lost in thoughts of sunshine.

—————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

Well, that was it… As I said before, Let me know what you think.

I’m pretty proud of it, really.

~♥EmieLove♥~

Well, This is what the inside of my mind looks like sometimes, so hello and welcome.  I wonder if anyone but you knows about the random little notes that are hidden…I hope not. This is our little secret. ♥