updates

It’s been a little while..lots has happened..i’ll back up.

april 16th was my concerto, basically the coolest thing i’ve ever done.  It went really well, there was a pretty good sized audience too.  I don’t really know how to describe it, it was just so much fun.  I was pooping my pants before i had to go on, but scott came backstage to my room (i got a little dressing room even!haha) to help me relax.  I was pretty relaxed by the time he got there actually..but it still helps when hes there, i’m not sure why..maybe i’ve just gotten used to it. Scott taped my performance, and i want to put it on youtube, but its too big..so we have to chop it up into two videos…so as soon as i get it up, i’ll post a link

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Scott and I are seeing eachother.. I don’t think i’m allowed to call it "dating" ..its kind of confusing.. neither of us is going to see other people..but he doesn’t know if he wants a "relationship" yet…so i guess this is like…..a…trial..relationship? i dont really know.  We are hanging out everyday, like we had been, nothing really has changed except he kisses me now haha. Things are going well… i knew they would…. It’s not really any different than being in a relationship honestly.. so, the title is confusing, but as long as hes not going to see anyone else, i can live with just "seeing eachother" ………………………………..for now

Graduation is in 2 weeks….i’m leaving for China…in 2 weeks ahhhhhhhh!! very excited!

My birthday was on thursday, it was nice. Scott took me to dinner at this place called Fireside Manor, it was really nice.  I ate a lot..i almost exploded haha

This weekend is fred fest..i’ve never really fully celebrated fred fest…. Fred fest is a weekend long drinking binge for most people here.  Its the last hoorah of the year, before dead week (the week before finals) They get dinosaur bbq to come set up here, theres usually bands playing and other varioius activities. But mostly it’s just everyone getting stupid drunk.  I think its kind of annoying honestly.  It was worse when i lived on campus because everyone was just drunk and loud all the time in the dorms, and I couldnt sleep.  I went home during fred fest sophomore year.  Freshman year i celebrated mildly, but just with my suitemates. Last year…didn’t really care about it..just like this year haha.  I really hate stupid drunk college kids..I mean, i’m all for having a good time, but i can’t stand going to clubs anymore where people just spill drinks on you, its so crowded that you cant even move, and random guys just try to hump and grind up on you on the dance floor.  I admit..i went to sunnys (affectionately known as scummys) sometimes when i was a freshman, and beginning of sophomore year, but you’d have to drag me in there kicking and screaming now.  I guess it’s something most people want to experience at some point, but i just got over it quicker than a lot of people i guess.  I would rather go to a bar where i can just sit and hang out with friends..talk and be silly.. Or to a friends house to play drinking games..both of which i’m doing tonight :~)

My mom is still sick..shes been doing slightly better, she still has the bag on her thats draining the bile and stuff..they have to wait until the "billy ruben" (cant spell that) goes down before they can take it out. billy ruben is the stuff that makes you yellow, jaundice. She has a bit more of an appetite lately though from what she tells me, which is great, bc she was eating next to nothing. Shes lost over 40lbs easily.  She has to go to get another biopsy bc we still don’t know exactly what is wrong with her…its very frustrating.

Thats all i have for updates…

a quick rant now..

I was watching mtv today for awhile…there was an old True Life on earlier..about girls on the jersey shore. All they talked about and did was go out and get drunk, and talk about boys. That is a "generic girl"…they all look the same..fake tan, fake colored hair, fake nails.  I have gone tanning, and dyed my hair, and had fake nails..but i’ve stopped tanning…i never tanned on a regular basis, never dyed my hair on a regular basis, and never had fake nails on a regular basis.  Generic girls all have the same hair cuts, or very similar, all have the fake tan, and basically wear the same trashy clothes.  It just really bothers me.  I love the fact that I’m different..not like weird different..but that I am not (by my definition) "generic", I think thats the worst thing i could ever be.  Those kinds of girls just come off as dumb to me. I’m just..really glad that i have more to do with my life than go out and get drunk all the time, obsess over loser boys, and go tanning..haha