UnExpected

She’s a unicorn beautiful and majestic  but unattainable  forever out of reach

so one day just hanging out at work you know sorting buds like usual SHE comes over always wears a mask so all I can see is half her face from eyes up never really gave her too much though but SHE does have the prettiest eyes A lovely icy blue/grey my favorite SHE is a little chaotic always moving never staying still zooming from here to there having little dance breaks talking working the whole shabang so one day I’m outside during  break smoking  with another co-worker and we see her in her car so we invite her over to come smoke with us so she hops in we smoke fast forward to the end of the day we just so happen to be walking  out together for the first time since ive worked here and so SHE’S talking to me about some personal drama happening between her and her ex  and I can help notice that I’m zoned in to this convo like I’m watching T.V I can’t look away I’m just starting into her eyes getting  lost  hanging on to every word she says because for some reason no matter what she’s talking about she puts her all into everything she’s saying getting all wound up about her  ex and all this drama(which I live for) so w.e we say bye we go home and I’m home just hanging out thinking hmmm I really liked talking to HER so maybe I’ll just hit HER up on Facebook so I hit her up we start talking w.e no big deal next day same thing lunch comes she comes smokes with us it’s a great time end of day we’re in our cars I load up a bowl start smoking she get in HER car I ask if she want to smoke b4 she heads home she says yes I hop in HER car we’re smoking the bowl talking and I notice as she’s talk about w.e I just stare into HER beautiful eyes I can’t help it just something about them I could stare into them forever and as the conversation picks up she’s getting  more into it using HER whole body lots of hands and I’m sitting there going omg why am I enjoying this so much why could I sit here listening to HER talk for hours and be okay with it what’s happening we go home and I’m in a great mood chillen texting HER and BAM it hits me ohhh fuck I have feelings for this GIRL and I’m like wait no how did this happen I’m not looking for a partner Ive just been working on myself and kind of getting more in touch with who i am etc.I’ve been broken up with my ex for about a year and a half 2 years or so (idk terrible with shit like that) anyway I’m like well shit hopefully it’s just something small it will go away prabably because HER eyes  but no everytime we talk whether it be txt or in person feelings just get stronger and stronger just hanging out at lunch listen to her talk about anything is just amazing I don’t know why I get so happy when I’m with her we don’t even need to be talking for me to feel like that just being in her presence has this effect on me that I’ve never felt (7yr relationship never felt these feeling) so to express how I was feeling I’d post happy good feeling songs on Facebook  happy post anything to tell HER without HER knowing (which I figure she knew but just never said anything) how I felt just because we spent a little extra time together outside work like she knows now kinda how I feel but I’m not sure if she actually has any idea on how strong of a hold she really has on me literally just by being herself like the light that shine off this girl is just euphoric I can’t get enough HER vibes HER energy is just perfect even if she’s having a bad day or isn’t feeling good yeah she might not be as talkative but HER energy HER aura stays the same honestly I think about her all the time but not like when I usually think about someone I like there is no(Sexual intimacy) involved it strictly just dumbass cute shit in my mind 24/7 which is crazy cuz I was never a cutesy feelings guy but I just wanna do all that stuff with HER snuggle in bed watching movies I wanna make her breakfast In bed and cook her dinner just lay on the couch and listen to her rant about how much our job sucks which is my favorite❤️ I want her to just rest her head on my lap as I play with her hair and give her forehead kisses I could go on and on with shit like this everyday my feelings grow stronger and everyday I hope that one day I could be the guy she’s looking for because besides making me the happiest guy in the world I would make sure everyday is filled with happiness and love and that SHE would have a smile every day because her smile is beautiful just like HER inside and out and I don’t think that i could of found this unexpected love anywhere else….my beautiful majestic unicorn(pinkie pie)

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August 3, 2023

I mean of course I know how you feel. You’ve said some of these things before.

Feelings are hard. I appreciate the raw entry.

Sometimes, maybe we feel things because it’s convenient or it feels good in the moment. But you already know where I stand. And I think of you highly as a friend so I’m not trying to say any more than that