summarily blah blah blah

I dreamt I was auditioning to be an L.A. tour guide and I was singing "The Groove is in the Heart" to people at restaurants. *blink*

So yesteday was up and down.

Went to Jons ADD assessment and she said she thought he had it and should be put on medication. *blink*

Yeah….. no.

She gave me this stuff to read about the meds and also some websites. I’ll read them, but quite honestly, I don’t want to put my son on the medication.It might help him, but I truly believe he CAN learn how to control himself. It’s mainly emotions and learning how to be patient. I dunno, I just don’t want my son dependent on a substance or taking something that will change who he is.

He got really upset when she said he had it and started to almost cry. She gave me all these check lists and asked for JOns report cards from pre school on up and it just sorta overwhelmed me and made me not want to do anything.

You see, if I didn’t nkow how to control my own overwhelmed emotions, I could be diagnosed with ADD too. But I know hot stay focused when I get upset and I LEARNED HOW TO DO THAT through my life. Jon can do the same damn thing. I’m pretty sure that he gets that same walls closing in, rushing in the ears, tears burning behind the eyes thing that I do. He just doesn’t know how to put it back in place and move on. Maybe I can teach him that. Drugs will only cover that up and he’ll never learn to deal with it.

I don’t know, we’ll see.

Then we had lunch. We were going to go to Chilis (his first choice) but we ran out of time. We ended up going to Carls Jr where I treated him to a big oreo shake. He said that he loves days when it’s just me and him. I realize he misses one on one time with me and I wonder if we did more of that if it would help. le sigh.

The second appt was also a bust. Jon was supposed to have one on one time with the therapist to talk about his "father" issues and such, but he didn’t want to do it. So no more therapy in that capacity for him because she said he probably didn’t need it anyway. She went on to say he should join a group therapy that is full on the day that would work for us. I signed up for the other just to be left alone, but I’m going to cancel and try again maybe in a few months when they are open again. I don’t know. That wasn’t what I expected or wanted. I think Jon DOES need to talk to someone, but he’s not ready and she wasn’t about to force him. So whatever.

After that we had time to come home for a minu te, so we did. I grabbed my jug o pee and went to the hopsital. I dropped it off and later I found out that my protein is above avg, WHATEVER. They’ll probably make me do it again.

I went to see the eye doctor and they reluctantly dilated my eyes (they didnt’ want to because I’m pregnant). I’ve never had that done before. After a prelim exam (I think I have 15/20 vision) they put me in a dark room. AFter about 15 minutes I went to check my phone and I COULDN’T SEE A DAMN THING. Like, it was a giant massive blur. I was freaked out. I was so pissed off.

The Dr. called me in about 20 minutes after that and checked my eyes and said they are fine, no diabetes and blah blah blah. That’s good. But I still couldn’t see. They gave me some disposable sunglasses that look like fruit roll ups and I went on my merry way… and I couldn’t see a damn thing clearly until around midnight. Now I could see things far away and BIG, but anything close to me, was a blur. I hope my vision is never ACTUALLY that bad. I’d be so upset!!!

So yeah, that was an experience for NOTHING.

It messed up an event I was doing for my website too,b ecause I couldn’t moderate because I couldn’t see what anyone was saying well. Blah.

So then I watched baboo beat Modern Warfar and then we watched "The Last Exorcism", which could have been good if the ending didn’t completely confuse the crippity crap out of me. I ended up looking up some interviews and things and then it sorta made sense, but I would have never gotten that from just watching the damn thing.

I am up this morning with too much energy so I can’t keep sitting here. I’m going to get laundry started, straighten up  my room, and try to wash my hair so I can straighten it at some point. I’m not sure if Baboo and I are going out to dinner for Valentines day, but I don’t care if we do or don’t. I just want to try to convince him to have a bit of sex with me. I’m sure he won’t, but I gotta try.

Seeing Nugget is a two edged sword because on one hand, I LOVE seeing my baby, but on the other, it makes the baby very real for Baboo which makes him want to put it in even less. Oh well. Maybe I’ll have sex again by this time next year.

blah.

Ok, gonna go do some chores and use this energy before I get lazy and just want to play video games for the rest of the day!

Loveyoupeople! *muah*

Oh yeah, I have a ticker. Look at that!

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 (A zombie apocalypse survival diary, for your reading pleasure and future knowledge when they take over the world. Yes, I am the author.)