Chaosbride

August 30, 2010

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I want a robot… that makes me pizza

I haven’t dared to print anything in color today and my stress level went down by LEAGUES! leagues.

yes.

I need to file shit.

I don’t want to.

filing makes me feel exasperated.

~~exhasperated?~~

whatever. I just want to throw all the paper in the air.

Why don’t I have a filing robot?

I’d name it Filebot 3000

She’d look like Rosie from the Jetsons.

Yes… SHE.

That would be saweet.

SAWEET I SAYAD.

Sometimes, I write that way, so you can hear the accent in my head. I hear many voices.

oh yeah.

i deleted a joke just now.

you wouldn’t have laughed.

If you have to write an entire paragraph to explain the joke, it’s just not funny anymore.

So hi.

We watched some movies this weekend.

yes we did.

"Meet Dave"… or not. it was so silly.

also "Transformers 2"

Which was also silly. But lots of explosions made it awesome.

We probably watched something else, but I swear, my brain has a broken

No short term memory.

NONE-ZO.

Ok, so I need a used post it filing system robot.

I’m trying to think of a way to invent it. I mean, I don’t like to throw away post its. They usually have some stupid bit of information on them that I don’t think I need… until I need it.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve rummaged around my post it grave yard and found a phone number or a date or a name that I needed. I scribble on them like a loon.

Everytime I answer the phone, I start writing on the post it. Who is calling and why and what and when. When I’m working, I jot down things on post its.

Post it’s rule my work life.

Anyway, I have a giant terrible mess of them. Big ones, small ones, ones with lines, ones with colors… it’s a mess.

I wish I had like… a place to put them where I could get to them easily and it would look nice.

(or a robot that would store them away and then recall them when I need them "Hey post-it bot, where’s that stupid one with the date I got that call about that thing" — zip zip shwing! "Here master, post it recovered." and it would be cute and probably blue and green and have a perpetual smile, but not a cheesy one, just a pleasant one. And it might have a little mini pizza oven so I could make pizza at my desk.)

I’m thinking of buying one of those little craft thingies with all the little drawers. I could shove post its in there.

I’m a truly crazy and boring individual.

got about an hour and 45 of work left.

And away we go!

oh! Before I go!

Be proud of me.

now.

I had a teensy tiny little four cheese pizza thin (that’s what it’s called!) for lunch today.

It was 300 calories and I thought for sure I’d run to get a candy bar or a sandwich or a spicy chicken bowl to top off my RAGING INFERNO BLACK HOLE OF A STOMACH… but one of my favs *big ups to my jess!* told me to drink water after every bite and I’d probably get full.

AND WOULDN’T YOU KNOW IT. I was.

and so my lunch was only 300 calories (instead of triple that) and I’m super proud.

I might just lose this stupid blubbery weight yet!

HUZZAH!

Ok, i’m leaving now.

And no, I’m not going to get a pizza, even though I could probably eat one.

Instead I’ll drink water and pretend.

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Last Words (A zombie apocalypse survival diary, for your reading pleasure and future knowledge when they take over the world. Yes, I am the author.)

Front page love! w00t!! We wanted pizza for dinner, but I stupidly lost the debit card. You make me pine even more for Dominoes now. Saweet! I lol’d

M.C.

August 31, 2010

HA! I tried that before. Didn’t think of it seriously enough to stick with it though. Not that I ever need to lose the weight but some things ya get curious with ya know. But glad ya tried it out and it seems to be working for ya anyway. Hope you reach your goal hun. And yes I’m proud of ya.

i had a sammich from subway. Whee. 🙂 Chris

RYN: I think it’s more number 3 than the others. You want a smacked bottom, and I would be happy to provide you a few good thwacks. 😉

Breathing Life In

Pizza sounds heavenly! RYN – I just got it trimmed, I got a drastic hair cut in 2008 and ever since then I’ve been trimming/hacking it off. I’d love to have long hair again though so my current plan is to keep it healthy and grow it out. Idk how long it’ll last….

Enthusiast

I need to try that water thing!

I bet there are a lot of people that would like a robotic woman lol and yes, you are correct, having to micromanage your life sucks ass

pintador

Sophe

While you’re inventing your filing robot don’t forget to invent the Decisio 5000. I’m still waiting on that one!

KPinK

those danged post its..

ryn: Well, I have a rant about this is well. Most of the time when it comes to real-life friends, I give a lot more than I get back, in terms of listening, being there, etc. I had this one friend all through high school and college that I thought was a pretty good deal…she did some shit that bothered me like always bum rides and never pay gas money and then call me out when I owed her a dollarat the coffee shop, but holy shit, that was ten years ago why do I remember that??? Anyway…when my youngest daughter got kidnapped I called to tell her about it (obviously needing a friend) and she was all “Ok well call me when you get things straightened out” and I was all “YOU BITCH!” in my head of course. And any other friend I had in college were really only friends by proxy so I guess what I am saying is that I have never had a TRUE girl friend. This could be because I’m a weirdo. I have found TRUE friendships on this here internet…and they have pulled me through this f’ed up time…for REAL. I think it’s because here on OD we don’t have to be all bullshitty and fake like in real life…we just say what we are and everyone can take it or leave it. cont…..

…which…if we could do that in real life…wouldn’t that just cut down on a bunch of crap???? Also, I’m so shy and kinda introverted that none of that shows on the internet…I can say what really goes on in my head but can’t ever get out cleverly or effectively in person… I’m always like “aarrgghh!!! no really!!! i’m funny and cool!!! you just can’t tell!!!!!!!!!” so yeah. now i just made it all about me again. girls just want to stand around and be jealous of one another, whether there’s a man involved or not. that’s what i think. dudes have it way easier. they just hang out and chill and not care about any of that stupid crap.

Night Owl

I also like to jot random phone numbers and other things on post its. I want a post it robot as well.

four.leaf.clover

I would die without post its!!

Hi I’m back, almost done with hating the world (which was not the world’s fault just the way I felt about hopeless love, you know what I mean?)! LOL Almost recovered my self-esteem Such an easy trap to fall into And the ego just won’t allow me to let go hahaha LOL!! I’ll catch-up over the next day or so

Without Wings

September 1, 2010

That water idea is a good one! I will have to try that because I am like the bottomless pit sometimes. Whatever I can shove into my mouth I do. O_o

For me, Transformers 2 was ruined by all the low brow humor. And a pizza-making robot, I’m all for that!

NotSoRedHead

September 2, 2010

Transform your postit’s into a notebook. You can still scribble on post it’s but when you go to clean them up, write all the info in a notebook and just throw them away. Right every other info bit in a different color so they stand out from each other 🙂