I must be looking crazy

 

 

 

 

I smile to myself cuz I can.

 

So, I think my co workers are noticing I’m reaching my limits.

I got an email from the second big boss referring me to counseling. She wanted to let me know that she was ok with me needing to take so many days off lately because she’s been in the same positoin as I am (dealing with a divorce, two boys, single parenting and the rest). so I guess she wanted to make me feel ok with it. but she also said that I should look into the free counseling at the City offers to help me deal with it all.

I almost want to. but not really.

Cuz I have that wall. And I will purposefully block myself off from anything that might be remotely good cuz I refuse to believe in it. That’s lame, but that’s MEEEE.

So yeah…

Then my direct supervisor noticed that I had been crying again and she was like STOP THAT! but I was upset over the whole paper "toss" and huff. I resolved it all, but bleh!

Then, one of my staff came over and gave me a hug and told me it will all be ok and she’s here to help me if I need anything done.

Blah.

So my conclusion is that I must look like a hot mess.

I actually don’t feel too frazzled anymore and I’m going to put my foot down and get a big amount of work done because I know it’s quite possible and it should help to set some of this to rest. If I’m producing a lot of work, then they have nothing to worry about.

 

So yeah, i’m grinding ahead and I plan on having a big stack of goodness to present to the second big boss to sign by lunch.

So that means I have to get to it.

blah.

so i’m a little distressed that perhaps i do look bad enough to warrant therapy… or "COUNSELING" which seems like the softer way of saying it.

I don’t know.

say nothing.