Don’t Call Me That You Idiot, and other fun tales!

Oh lets see.

It’s Thursday.

Hello.

I like you. You like me. We like we. Rejoice.

I have had a bummer hell of a week. I’m on the tail end of one nasty bug of some sort of flu or whatever. It sucked. I thought I was gonna be a gonner yesterday cuz I  came to work and tried to medicate up and it wasn’t working. This morning I coughed up a nice ball of blood and felt better.

what a wonderous thing.

Wanna hear something annoying? I finally got a phone charger. yay! I could have asked my family to mail it to me, but my family is the type to say "sure we’ll do that! no problem" and never do it. And being without my phone for the last few days has been HORRIBLE.

So I had 2 messages.

One from the love of my life, My Kim. I love her so much it’s retarded. heh. not retarded, how could it be so? it’s just overwhelming sometimes and I wish I could see her more.

Then one from buttcrackstupidheadretardedloseroftheuniverse.  if you don’t know who that is… oh… it’s just a person who fits every single adjective and horrible word used up there. Anyway, at first ididn’t know it was him. the message started with "Hey sexy girl"

I didn’t recognize the voice (hooray for not having to talk to him for THREE MONTHS IN A ROW NOW!) and I was thinking "oh great, who did I give my number to who is now finding some reason to talk to me?"

Because, let it be known, that I have completely fallen off the face of the earth of every single boy I could have even begun to talk to. And that’s fine with me. When I said I was tired, I meant it. I’m not looking and I don’t care. But I was really puzzled. I was thinking "oh my god, what if it’s damngorgeous?!" He does have my number, but after our brief IM session the other day, I haven’t heard a peep. *shrug* i don’t care really.

so then I thought it might be photoboy…

yeah, all that flashed through my head in like .5 seconds.

then the real message started "I put some money inthe account for the car payment blah blah blah gonna try to get some more so you can get the boys some christmas gifts blah blah blah i liked hearing your voice on your voicemail message blah blah blah ok bye"

*fume*

he’s such a fucking idiot.

I know that he has some weird notion that I’ve beensitting in a chastity belt lamenting over him for the past year and almost 6 months. Well, think again idiot. I haven’t. Not that I’m going to proclaim that to him. My life is none of his concern.And until he can get his fucking act together I don’t want to even hear him mention MY sons name. stupid loser from hell. God, income taxes, immediate divorce. I don’t care whatever else I have to pay, i’m ENDING THIS BULLSHIT.

so yeah, that just ruined my night. I went to bed early and felt like a hellstick. ihate him. he makes me so angry everything gets clouded.

Enough of this.

So before that (my phone had to charge) I worked someon my nanowrimo. I only have 12k words to go. Only 12,000?! Yeah, only. I do believe I can knock that out today BEFORE I leave work. ha ha. Unless a pile of doom falls. Which it probably will. And if so, I think I can still do it, because last night I knocked out 10,000 in about an hour and a half. Yep.

Where is your pipe? did you put it in and take a puff? breath it in, cuz it is supah special blend.

Anyway, I’m sort of doing it a cheaters way. And this is how. I have about 13 chapters… i think, something like that. Anyway, i have a vision for each, and i’m basically writing a quick overview of it. That’s the wrong word. I’m writing what I want the chapters to be, but I’m leaving a LOT of the detail out of them. I plan on going back and rewriting them, which means I’ll be working on this past the nanowrimo. But, if i can STILL pump out 50k words of what i want in this timeframe and NOT be a total loser, then wahoodle on a boodle for me. I am not going to post the rough work though, simply because that will not do my story justice. But there will be 50k words of it finished by midnight tonight. I even have a vision that it will be done before I leave work… and maybe leaving me some time while i’m here to clean a few sections up to post.

that is if anybody cares. bleh. whatever. I’ll post it up till i’m finished. it will be far beyond the goal of words. and that makes me happy.

super happy.

on a bun.

but only in a section of me that can be happy right now.

i know I’ve been such a recluse and I hate it.

i’m gonna shake the funk.

as soon as i start bleeding (tribal dances welcome) and i get a few more rogue idiotic thoughts back in their holding pens, i’ll be better.

I will also take my lazy ass (probably on friday) and catch up with all of my favs. anyone still around reading this blather… i’m sorry for being so quiet and weird. I know, I know, i shouldn’t quite apologize for it. But to be a part of a community like this that is all about the interactions that we share… i feel like a loser for letting the stupid things that are bothering me make me act this way.

meds meds, we all fall down.

speaking of which, i’m going to take a dayquil and do a little bit of work before i dive into nano’ing.

i will not fail.