10/25/03 part 1
Well it is now the Twenty Fifth of October it is 1:00 in the morning as well. For me, I am sick. I have the starting of a cold, and well its to the point right now that I hate. The for always itchy nose and you think your going to sneeze all the time. My eye water too when I get ready to sneeze. For the past three days that I know of the back of my throat was sore. I kept checking to make sure that things werent turning ugly back there. The last thing I need right now is to get down right sick. The in bed sick, where I just want to die sick even though I feel like doing that some days. Yet on a go I hang in there for one more day. Again and again, just one more day. We are done to I believe 15 days until we are back in San Diego. Yeah thats the count. We still have to cross that damn date line, and do a day twice. Get this though, before we hit the date line, we still have to set the clocks back twice ! Then we go a hole day back. We leave here Sunday morning (Guam that is), so we should set them back Sunday night maybe. If not Sunday, then it will be Monday, and then the Wednesday. No matter how we do it, it will be one day, and then wait a day, and then set them back again. Once we hit the date line, then we start adding hours ! We add two hours I believe from the date line to Hawaii, and from Hawaii to San Diego we will add another two hours.
Got my eval today and well what the final marks were is adding to my even more depressed mood. What I gave to my division officer, and what I read today they are two totally different things. And the marks, well we dont even need to talk about them. I wasnt impressed with what came back, lets just put it that way. I was told that I am a hot head and that I snap at junior personal far to much. Well you know what, I only snap because I can not, nor will I stand for stupidity in my presence. I can control it, and if you dont like the way I do it, then dont be around me. Its that simple ! Then there was something else said that I show smiles and all that around my bosses but am a different person when they arent around. You know what, I treat everyone on this ship the same way I give you as much respect as you give me. You dont give me any, Im not going to give you any no matter who you are. If I am having a bad day, you will know. If I am having a good day, you will know but that does not effect how I treat people around here. I am far to knowledgeable in my job to have someone that thinks they know what is going on to come up and tell me what to do when I am already doing it. If I have the paper, or the instruction with me that says what is going to happen, or what I am going to be doing I follow that. I am not going to sugar coat things for someone that is less of a pay grade to me. I dont have to do that, and I am not going to do that. It under minds the hole chain of command thing that the military is based on. I didnt ask my first class when I was a seaman, or a third class why all the time. I knew better. I did what he told me, and that was that. After the fact, then I could ask and that is the way it is suppose to be. Not around here though people would rather stand around and bitch and complain and ask But why? far to many times then needed. Something else that I dont like and it happens far to many times here too when I say something, short answers are the best. Limit your words to yes/no if at all possible.