She’s got a love like woe.

Today. Today has been all over the place. As I stated earlier, my morning sucked. My work day sucked. 

So after I decided to try taking a walk. Went to the dam, hung out there for a while. Then went to the dock to hang out with Jacob and walk around. Well. Some kid spit in his direction, and Jacob blew up and then the kid was tellin him to come up and try something, so Jacob walks his happy ass over the bridge, and as he’s walking I see something. Before I even hear the click, I know he’s got his knife out. God damn it Jacob… I yell at him. "Jacob Mitchell you put that away now." He doesn’t listen. There’s yelling. Arguing. Then he finds out dude is only 16. No way is Jacob about to go back to jail. He walks away. Comes back toward me. I call him ridiculous. Then kid comes down to the dock trying to start more shit. I was certain I was going to get caught up in the middle of it. I was so scared I could feel my heartbeat in my throat. But the kid decided to get on his bike and leave, and then I made Jacob leave the park with me. We walked around for a while before he walked me back home.

Got home and got comfy in my bra and shorts. Was just lyin here, and all of a sudden my dad is yelling up the stairs at me. No later than I reply with "What?" is he through my bedroom door saying "There’s an ambulance down the street. I think it’s at Uncle Bob’s house. Run down there and check." Threw on John’s sweat pants and a tank top and took off out the door and down the street. They weren’t at Bob’s thank god, but I kept running to see where it was. When I got where they were I noticed that one of the little toddler’s from my daycare was in a man’s arms that was talking to a police officer, screaming bloody murder and crying her little eyes out. That makes me worry. So much. What kind of stuff is she growing up around?

Tonight has just been way too much for me. I was so scared Jacob was going to have blood on his hands all over again. Scared the something bad had happened to Uncle Bob. Scared that something is going on in that little girl’s life. Scared because I’m all alone in the dark, and the monsters are always loudest when the lights go out at night…

I need John… I need John so badly tonight…

<3CaseyRenee<3