Dream, Posessed

What did i learn? Perhaps, do not speak my mind as often as i normally would?

Here is sit, awake at 2 am from one of my infamous vivid dreams. Though often post apocolyptic, this one was not…. tastes and tinges around the edges cry of otherworldliness.

Here we go- never to return unscathed.

Can this be portentious?

I am ordering a dbl short americano- what i normally order to test if a coffee place is good. There may be a bearded boy who noticed me, i may have flirted with him. Its hazy. I stand at the counter, unimpressed with the way they make coffee. This especially because i have close friends who prode themselves in coffe skillz, and are indeed, very good.

A woman is standing behind the counter, making my coffee and chatting with someone she works with. She is snobby and obviously does not care whether this is a quality drink. I may have politely mentioned something about my drink…..needing changed, dont know. She goes off on my, i cant remember hte specifics. I look at her and say, "you know, you are very annoying." i continue a little bit about how she comes off ad high and mighty, reminding me of Portland hipsters that know it all. Instantly i regret it, because i am a good person who does not say hurtful things on person (though i am a person who speaks her mind). I am shame faced and upset that i treated someone so badly. The woman is pissed, as is her boy/friend, this steam punk-circusy type guy. I can tell the guy who likes me is upset, maybe more for reasons that involve him needing to stick with his friends. A sheep, basically

I leave and i want to appologize. I find these steampunk people sitting on a lawn, or all together on the ground outside. I let them know (for some reason i cant tell if the woman i offended was in the crowd) what was going on in my head to cause such a reaction and i also logically say what it was the woman did that was rude, and i ask for forgiveness. The boy/friend stands and asks "rebel or join" (or some such) and most people yell "rebel!" I do not know what is going on, but i get a sense that while in the coffee shop i should not have sat passively while this woman berates me, i should have rebelled (this isweird part).

Everyone stand and i join them? I am running with this wild crowd, following in an adventure that requires me to run through very active road construction, hop over moving equipment. I feel as if it might have been an initiation ritual or something. This is where my dreambreain gets hazy. I follow. Someone pulls me up on this big oily machine.

Then nothing. I wake in my dreamhouse. I can barely think. No one else is there. I am confused and everything is spinning. I panic and do not know what happened.  I step outside and my friend Emily is there. She shushes me and urges me to hide under the porch. People had been looking for me. Seriously, as if i had been missing. Em is on the phone saying she had not seen me. Crowds of people stand around the porch while i hide,

At this point i am going to take a break to save this, in case my computer dies. I am not with cord right now.

Ok, i am back. You never even noticed i was gone.

So, all these people are standing around, meeting about the search. Eventually one sees me under the porch, It is ominous, Like she is leering and i should not have been found.

Everything is black again.

Flashes. A doctor. Asks about past drug use. I tell him about my bad experiences with hallucinogens. He asks about cocaine, and i say no. Not even to stay awake and finish a task, or get a good grade, I laugh at him and wittily retort that i do not need drugs to get good grades.

A psychologist.

Hiding,

Wondering.

LEarning about a missing part of my life that i cannot remember. What did these people do to me?

I learn that they fed me a lot of drugs, but there were unintended consequences.