2012: the year we party into the apocalypse
It’s strange. I didn’t realize I haven’t posted since the middle of past month. Happy new year? People usually give up on that after the first week…
I made a word press diary and I’ve written there a few times. It just feels like I’m writing to a well here. Back in the Old OD, before paid subscriptions, I remember a lot more interaction. I’ve commented on what I like, I’ve bookmarked and friended who I think I could either relate to, or am curious about how I can’t. It’s just different.
I check a lot of movies out from the library that I wouldn’t normally see. But I do because their free. Maybe I need to random up some of the OD’s I read the same way.
But my tone here is different. I type like I’m speaking to someone about my problems. Over there, I already started sounding like I’m putting on a brave face, talking about grand plans, etc. And to my first delays and ensuing anger this morning, it’s a lot easier to post here.
Another reason I went on twitter more than facebook is that it’s like a bigger ocean to throw a message in. People inadvertently come across my messages thru others reposting or keywords.
There’s a list of things I’m working on for this year. I’m trying to rewire my snap judgements and try and “look at things from behind them,” if that makes sense.
Maybe I should have taken coding in college. Of course I might have spent the last decade in a cubicle and not partying it up in Vegas. But if I understood code, I could take my favorite parts of Myspace, facebook, open diary, twitter and even facebook and mash them all together. I go to each for the little bit I like, and hate each site for what they’re not.
I’ve done a lot of thinking about 2012 last week, putting aside my regular errands to evaluate last year. I need to be happier. And I have spent a lot of time worrying, wracking my brain and being responsible.
This year I have to be less Alan and more Charlie. For a year I’d rather be numb about my problems from partying instead of hitting my head attempting to problem solve brick walls. I at least need to have the attitude, since I don’t have the bar tab money.
You know, guys get a lot of shit for being a player. And lately I have seen an “empowerment” of women that not only do the same thing, but are frankly demanding and bitchy about it. This year, I have to get back to being a bro. And that has a lot of shady meanings to some women.
But to me, there is a code of honor. No, it’s not about doing shady shit to get laid. There are a lot of married people and families that give single people a lot of shit and I know some women can relate to this too. If I had a dollar for every woman posting about how they didn’t have a boyfriend “for the holidays,” just to get some mock approval at the family get together or employee parties and new years. And then these women conveniently break up with the guy when they go back to work after new years.
I’ve been watching movies and shows about the single guy, the guy that enjoys being single. Or representations of him. It can be Tramp or it can be Peter Pan, even The Grinch (before he had to succumb to another society), even Batman before the entourage. In fact most superheroes and their nemeses are branded “loners.” See, everyone wants to hate on someone because they go thru life without obligations or “settling down.” Just the phrase itself!
A lot of women get pissed at single guys too. And I have a few theories I’m not going to anger a gender by mentioning, but they have all proven to be true, even posted by them.
For over 3 years, I tried wearing the white “boyfriend” hat. And to be honest, in that moving truck, I felt a huge weight off my shoulders as I was on my own and could think for me and me alone. And I didn’t have to be someone’s personal assistant. I didn’t have to "compromise" which always meant "do it her way" and amnesia from her when I needed something- urgent- later.
When I get a job, I’m going to be the most partiest, happiest bachelor since Hef could get away with dating more than one woman at a time.