22:08-22:13

why am I throwing myself apart thinking about him every second when he isn’t doing the same for me? I just want him to appear but i know it’s not going to happen and he’s been gone all day…i’m going on two days without speaking to him at all. i wish i could get out to WI sooner…so much sooner. actually i don’t even want to go out there…because he’ll not be there. why do i have to be so emotional? i wish i had some drugs and alcohol right now i’d fucking down them so quickly. i need to get my mind off him. i wish it weren’t dark outside…i neeed to go for another walk…i need him so much right now…i really do need him.