Life

I used to be insecure and had a low self esteem. When I was this way it made me judge everyone around me. Especially women. I would find one thing and run off with it. My lack of self confidence made me rude. I would point out women’s flaws. I remember always being ungrateful. And jealous. I would talk about people behind their back. And constantly. It took me a long time to grow up and not be that way. The old saying “if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all” I used to think was cheesy but now I always remind myself of that when something comes to my mind. I’m not sure what made me change; perhaps some of the trauma I’ve been through has opened my eyes. I do realize now it has made a difference people wanna be around me, they surprise me with  stuff, all sorts of things. And I’m just all around more happy. I still lack confidence every so often. But that doesn’t make me want to put someone down. That tells me I have came a long way. I also have a motto of “fake it til you make it” meaning if you’re not confident pretend that you are until you eventually believe it, if you have mean thoughts pretend you don’t until they’re gone. Sounds silly to some but it seems to work for me