August 29, 2013

Don’t go there!

Yesterday I took a half day of work so that by child care provider could take the older kids to the State Fair. I don’t take time off ever so it was nice to spend some time with little man. We went to my grandmas and picked up diapers and stuff she had for us there. Then she gave me money so Noah and I could go get some ice cream because it was so hot. So we did that. I really do love spending time with just Noah. I think he enjoys mommy fun time too.

Noah is in the terrible two’s stage but he is not as bad as he was months ago. He really is well behaved when he’s behaving himself. I love that he’s become more affectionate. Giving hugs and kisses all the time. He really is a sweet boy. But this kid seriously does not go to bed until 10 pm every single night!!! I don’t know if its the naps or what. Yesterday I picked him up before nap time so he did not get one only except for a 5 minute snooze in the car on the way to my grandparents. Last night we sat down in the chair playing Minion Rush and he fell asleep by 8:15!! I don’t remember the last time he feel asleep that early. I cannot not give him naps during the day because he gets tired and needs naps. Maybe I need to see about cutting them down to an hour or less. *shrugs*

This kid also refuses to go to sleep in his own bed. If he falls asleep on the couch or in bed with me and we put him in his bed 8 xs out of 10 he stays asleep all night in his own bed. Then the other times he will wake back up in the middle of the night and sneak his way into our bed. Dave put Noah in his bed last night. I went to bed at 9. Woke up in the middle of the night and there was Noah sound asleep. I did not feel him crawl up in the middle of us at all. darn kid! 🙂

So I went to my grandma’s (this is my mom’s mom) last night. I hate how my uncle talks to her. He’s 45 or so years old and he still lives at home. Probably always will. Long story short he made a bunch of money over the past month (certified welder) and did not give my grandmother a dime!!! That makes me angry. Anyways, my grandma was telling my my step-mom Helene and dad were up there recently (they live a couple houses down). Helene was saying how we never stop over to their house and they only hear from us when we need our cars fixed. You know what my grandma said "tough shit he should be". He never did anything for us when we were kids. I told my grandma I was done with making an effort. He SHOULD BE making an effort to be a part of his grandson’s life. He doesn’t call or ask how He’s doing. He doesn’t stop over to my house EVER. I live a mile from my grandparents (his parents) He has to drive by my house when they visit them. Does he stop or call? NO! Why should it be me?! I told them months ago I was done doing this. My father has NEVER made an effort! It was always ME DOING! They make an effort to see her son in prison EVERY MONTH without fail. She makes an effort to write him I’m sure frequently. He never took care of me. NEVER! When she told me that I was so angry! I need to stop being angry. I hate being angry. I hate that I let them make me feel like this. Then I feel bad.. should I be the bigger one and go over there? Then when I do I still never hear from them. What’s the point? *sigh*

Running is going well. I botched my 1/2 marathon training for the race that’s next weekend. I had a virus for like 3 weeks back in July. So I am planning and training for one that’s in March 2014. I have a 5k October 6th, I want to do the Thanksgiving Day 10k in November. I would like to find a race in December. I refuse to get into a rut like last year and get so off course that I have to start over. I refuse to gain weight over this coming holiday season. I am currently holding my weight at 130. I’m transitioning into maintenance mind set from a weight loss mind set which is hard.

I have a couple more Dear Letters but I will save them for another time. I realized I forgot a few important people.

Well that’s all I have for the moment!