I WANTED US TO WORK

I wanted us to work. I wanted us to work so badly! I wold’ve of done anything for it to work. But he wanted me to degrade myself, invalidate me and gaslight me and never give me clear answers and play games. That’s where I draw the line. That’s where I make a full stop and say No Thank You. Because if this is what it makes to be in a relationship with you, then you can go to hell and stay there! If he wanted it to work, he would listen, he wouldn’t make me feel strange for asking questions that require clarity. He wouldn’t make it seem as though making me wanting to work through it, means something is wrong with me. And he definitely wouldn’t make threats of ending the relationship as a means of controlling my actions. If I ask him a yes or no question, his first response would be, “Can you calm down?” You would think that the person who claims that they’ve missed you 2 days ago (and changed his mind apparently) would be SO FRICKIN HAPPY that you called them!! That they finally have a chance to right their wrongs. But he looked at it as the opportunity to keep treating me like I don’t matter because it meant that I would come back. That’s the part that I couldn’t live with. And that’s why I blocked him everywhere later that night.