Annoyed. 7/12/2021

Ugh such a good day turned into a negative one. Sometimes i get so angry in myself for having such a forgiving heart. People will show who they really are but being dumb i choose to ignore it. Causing me to get hurt in the end. My family and friends told me this relationship wasnt a good one but yet i stay… thinking he is going to change things are going to get better but they just remain the same a week later. Another day and a another fight because he came home annoyed at whatever pissed him off for the day.. i should have noticed the signs when he walked in the door but me being me i chose to ignore them.. now look at where im at in bed while i get ignored by him… i honestly dont know what to truly do anymore at this point. It has me so nervous to move back in.. i would just stay at my moms but then i know she will say she was right.. so now im just confused and stuck.. i wish this relationship was an easy one.. where we can communicate and be fine. But its always a guessing game about something or waking up not sure if there will be a fight that day.. so over fighting and just nasty words being said. Everything i would trust him with gets brought up in a fight and he uses in such a ugly way. As like a way to get to me.. and then when i argue back i get told by his mom and him that its not right to fight with him when he is so stressed. So i just have to sit and just be someone emotionally punching bag when they are having a rough day.. I just dont know what to do.. 3 years and the same thing over and over again. Ive lost so many friends and family just lost all respect for me. Currently laying in bed upset while he just laughs and enjoys the game with his friends and brothers after being so ugly towards me. Im just drained.. cant trust anyone with any information about me anymore..

IcchyB

Think about it – he was raised by someone who thinks that his stress means that you have to be silent and abused. Pardon me, but eff that. Do what you need to do to respect yourself. Once you have that, the respect of others will follow. Even if it doesn’t, so what? YOU are who is important here.

1 reply

@icchyb whats crazy is i tried talking to his mom but she just tells me to ignore it.. ive expressed to her how it has made my depression and anxiety worse.. and then when i do argue back i get told its so wrong of me because he has school or work or car stress..

Carina

Honey, what he’s doing to you is emotional abuse. He is a narcissist. and they do this sort of thing… regularly… and it only gets worse. And he was likely raised by a narcissist, so he thinks this behavior is normal. There are red flags all over the place with this guy.

Sweetie, you need to take care of you. If you don’t want to go to your mom’s. do you have a friend you can move in with? What about renting a studio apartment for yourself? If you say no to those two, you probably will have to go back to your mom’s, but you know what? You don’t have to listen or internalize her, “I told you so.” Ignore. Ignore. Ignore.

But seriously, get yourself out of that place and away from him, pronto. He’s only going to get worse as time goes on, and never, ever talk to his mother about him. There is a special bond beetween mothers and sons, and she will crush you to make him look good… no matter what. Avoid her like the plague

2 replies

@caria you are right about their bond.. i know she knows his behavior is not right but she will never correct him. I feel like im crazy everytime i stand up for myself because they make me feel that way or he will tell me i need to take my meds.

@breezy22 Yeah, baby. That boy is a narcissist. No question in my mind. And you are NOT crazy. Tell yourself that over and over until you believe it. You are NOT crazy. You are STRONG. You are SMART. You are COURAGEOUS. You are BEAUTIFUL. You are ENOUGH.

Now run, don’t walk away from this guy and this situation. I’m not trying to be hurtful when I say this, but he can’t love anyone except himself and maybe his mama.