All About Him…..Rico
It’s been a while since I’ve been in deep genuine love…and he is that for me. Rico and I met in the winter of 2009…at a house party. I was drunk way beyond the legal limit and he was the finest thing at the house. I flirted…winked…cracked jokes and danced around the house…being my usual self. He didn’t say one word….just looked….I never thought I’d have a chance. About 3 days later, my cousin called me and said ‘Roys’s friend wants to talk to you…’….my mind went to the stick creature, who’s name escapes me, that was there with Rico and Roy…I said ‘Naw I’m good…he’s not my type.’ She laughed and said ‘All you were talking about was how fine he was.’…it was Rico…we exchanged numbers via my cousin…..and that’s how it started.
Rico and I spent almost every day together…falling asleep in each other’s arms with the window cracked, midnight air grazing our skin…kissing passionately during half times of NBA games…he was the missing puzzle piece…undoubtedly, I fell fast….and hard…..and so did he. We began saying ‘I love you’….I got scared…this was the first man I loved as an adult besides my son’s father….then I found out I was pregnant. He was excited…I was excited…I made it to 10 weeks and had a miscarriage. I pulled back…I stopped answering phone calls…he gave up….he moved back to his home town. My heart ached for him daily…and I filled the void with T, who is a whole ‘nother story….he changed his number…we were through….or so I thought…..
Several months later, I logged onto FB and one of many requests was him….my heart froze….I accepted and went to his page….’In a relationship with KW.’…..my heart dropped…then my msg icon lit up, and it was him….we exchanged numbers….and began texting back and forth….soon we were reminiscing about our time together and he revealed that he couldn’t love his current GF because he was still in love with me. We began sneaking away for weekends full of sex and passion…we would go back and forth over why he wouldn’t leave her…he was holding something back….but I couldn’t put my finger on it…until that day….
That day had started off rough for me…I logged onto FB to see him announcing that he saw his healthy baby girl craddled in her mother’s womb….she was pregnant…..and not just a little pregnant…..but 7 months along. For the first time since I lost our baby, I cried….boohoo’d….broke down…..called him and snapped…here I was BACK in love with the man that I KNEW was put on Earth for me and his girlfriend was pregnant. Rewind about 2 weeks and he was here….in my town…and we were together for his birthday…me, him and all his friends…as they told me that all he talked about was how he was going to marry me. How did it all go so wrong?
He confessed that she was pregnant and that he had been struggling with the way to tell her that he was leaving…I told him don’t make a choice…it was, what it was…I hung up….4 hours later, he was at my doorstep….I let him in….we made love…and he held me as I cried….I didn’t walk away….I should have…but i didn’t…..so here we are…a month later….and i’m still madly in love with this man…and I don’t know what to do.
When did life become so complicated?