Seriously?

I have many things to talk about.  Very first thing of business.   I am talking to a man that I met many moons ago.  He is my very.  Very attentive, attractive, kind, gentle, beyond everything, that matters.  So kind.  And I am so glad to be in touch with him again.   And we met right here on OD.  I was intrigued first of his posts.  And then found out he was frequently around my home.  That, and many other things drew me to him.  Such  a kind man.  He is amazing.   Knows about my past.  No judgement.  Just his kindness.

It is what drew me to my partner now.  His kindness.  For me ” The bad boy” decked with tats, long, black hair,  gorgeous.   Tall and lanky.  6″ and 125 lb..  He just is.  Last night, I heard what i thought were gun shots outside my window.  I had a bad childhood.   A man my mom was with took my everything when I was 13.  Lasted till I was 17.  He bought a 30 aught 6. I dont know if that is even the right name.

He would take it and shoot it outside to scare my sister and me.  And then sit there in the living room cleaning it.  Intimidation.

Last night.  My partner came and held me.  He let me hold him.  And it was just fireworks.  And he asked me.  “If you thought that was shots, it bothered you that much?” I shook my head in his chest.  He said “wow.  I am sorry.”

And I am still worrying about those what I thought were gun shots.

He went to jail.  He got a 4 yr sentence.  He was out in 2 yrs for good behavior.   My grandpa took a bat to him when he got out.

My sis text me and told me about 2 yrs ago.  He died. I was glad.

Is that bad?