How to survive…

The title may be misleading, I don’t have the answer. I am just stumped and questioning myself, why am I trying so hard to survive when It’s making me miserable. I sit here, looking for employment and I’m shocked how some, if not most starting wages are still at $7 to $8 dollars an hour. I am struggling at (not struggling but definitely can use more than the current) $13.5 an hr and I am supposed to take a huge step back for less? I had an interview today, and though $13 isn’t’ a drastic cut/sacrifice but then when he explained how i would be juggling all these tasks, I was like okay I can do this. The pizza joint was dead, I never hear anyone speak highly of their pizza and not even sure how they are relevant cause always tasted burnt. I was like, doesn’t seem like a stressful situation. Then I noticed he is highly understaffed, no one looked happy or in a positive mood…his one and only question was “what are the positives of working”.

The fuck kind of question is that, like please speak to me in complete sentences or elaborate.

I have honestly loved almost every single job I have had, maybe not so much the one I was a customer service representative for comcast. I have experience in pizza joints, as cashier, food prep and even as far as assistant manager. What positives are you looking for especially when I had already expressed, I enjoy engaging with customers, enjoy the pizza joint over a burger joint any day. How my previous experience should make me feel at home in no time if hired. How I am capable of multitasking and enjoy the thrill of rushes. How I am very goal oriented and enjoy numbers, so I excel in beating goal plans and love problem solving. Then he proceeds to tell me there is no favoritism, that they are like a no bs environment. That they goof off but there is always something to do, how the hours given to me would be based on my performance. How I would have to make the dough from scratch, also wear a headset to help with drive thru, not to mention tend the front of the store for dine in plus….so I would do everything. I begin to think, if this really worth the 13 an hr? He tells me he will work me hard, tf. Then tells me that there is a girl that works there that is amazing and that even though there is language barrier she is his favorite. The lies already. I am not seeing a point to this interview, I been asked one question (since he asked me questions over a text the day before) and the rest of the time he just was spitting out history facts like when it first opened, how many stores and locations, how many he runs, how the new owners bought it off. All nonsense to me. That information will not help me up sale your ranch sir.

I know, I complain so much and This might make me come off as not grateful for the opportunity, but I didn’t vibe with this guy, I’d likely dislike working for him. I felt so uncomfortable just smiling and listening to his knowledge of this pizza joint food chain. He made me feel like my experience is nothing compared to what this job would put me thru and truth be told I thought I was an asset. Now I’m thinking, I want better. More structure, a team, someone to follow and not suddenly be thrown in with the same responsibilities as a shift lead or manager for just $13. I think the thing that bugged me the most is that he is hiring for multiple positions, shift lead and general manager but to him I don’t think he thought I was good enough for a starting position.

Well fuck me.

Time to continue looking for work in a small city in Texas.

Just another rant from little ol me.