I Think It’s Important to Feel Loved

Especially on your birthday. And I wasn’t so sure that was how I was going to be feeling today. In fact, I pretty much was convinced it was going to be the complete opposite of that. Yesterday afternoon into the early evening I was moping and on the verge of tears for most of the day.

Salem had been sure of what day my birthday was for almost a month, but the last week she didn’t talk about it at all, and the last 3 times I asked her if she knew what today was, she had no clue. Not that things have been bad between Scott and me, but they haven’t been over the top romantics either, and we spent most of the weekend fighting. Scott went to dinner with his bandmates last night to talk about recording, and Salem and I worked on her sight words and I told her if she could get them all right, she could have cake and then it clicked in her head what day was coming, and she burst into tears that her daddy wasn’t home and hadn’t taken her shopping yet. So she asked to call him and he promised to take her shopping when he got home. 

So this morning I woke up to a kiss from my husband and a whispered Happy Birthday. When I really opened up my eyes I had a few really nice messages on Facebook from friends and family, and one from Scott that read, "Happy Birthday to my bride, my queen, my partner in crime, my sunshine girl….my everything! You are loved beyond measure. Enjoy your day baby girl!" Swoon. I had no idea he was feeling that way about me lately. He locked me in the bathroom while he and the kids put my birthday presents together. He had them each buy me a card, and one from himself. He did really good with that. He knows that the cards mean more to me than anything else. Salem got me a pair of Minnie Mouse footie pajamas, Ian got me a coffee measurer for our Keurig, and Scott got me Fifty Shades of Grey even though we agreed I wasn’t getting anything since we spent $300 between my tattoo and new hair color. I guess he figured the only way I was going to read it was if he bought it, and I know he really wanted me to read it. My family made me feel really loved this morning. 

And the well wishes from more friends and family all day have helped. I believe in making a really big deal out of birthdays. People need to know that they are special. This is the first birthday I have spent the entire day away from Scott since we have been married. We have always taken days off for each others birthdays and for the kids, but it just wasn’t in the cards this year. This is also the first year out of the last 3 that we are not going to Disneyland. I’m not sure what I want to do tonight. I see Starbucks in my future though. And some cuddling. My dad gave me $50 and told me to buy myself something pretty, so maybe a little shopping? I really just want to be with my family. 

The first part of my day was pretty challenging. I took Ian to have his ultrasound done and I feel like I did everything backwards today. In addition he was super grumpy and chose today to be the day that he threw his first temper tantrums ever. Seriously throwing himself to the floor and screaming. I am hoping it was a one time thing since our visit was right in the middle of nap time. The plus was that I finally got to go to the children’s hospital for his tests, and the technician let me know that it was her goal not to leave him traumatized, and let me jump up on the table with him and nurse to avoid having to hold him down. So far it was the most pleasant testing experience we have had. I hope from here on out all of his tests are approved to be done there. 

Here’s hoping I have a night full of happiness and love coming my way. I’ll be noting tomorrow.