Exception

The ever exhausting college life starts again soon. The fall semester hangs above me, reminding me that this isolation isn’t a direct choice I at some point mysteriously decided to inflict upon myself. Instead, I find comfort in that I won’t be lonely anymore, even if just for a little while. I still don’t know what I’m going to do once I’m done with school. I don’t have that much time left.

I thought it would be nice to travel around the world for awhile, but all aspirations I’ve ever made of traveling have always ended prematurely and in dissapointment. It’s my own fault. I can’t stand watching people struggle with life so I’m always far too carefree with my money. I’ve always been that way. Sadly, these habitual feelings have led to me dissapointing a lot of people I promised to visit at some point or another.

Maybe that’s why I don’t talk to my distant friends anymore, or maybe people simply grow apart.

I don’t know, just like I’ve never really known and will probably never know.

I got recommended for a high paying job at my school not too long ago in addition to being added into the honors program at my college.

My teacher recommended for the position which is almost enough to guarantee a hire. Regardless, I was still required to fill out an application. When I picked it up the application at the administration office on campus and began to fill it out, I became disheartened when the application asked for the information of two people who could recommend me. My teacher was obviously one of the names I filled out, but I realized I only had my teacher to recommend me. There wasn’t anyone else in my life who could. No one else I could ask.

As of today, I have yet to turn in my application.

I hope I’m able to build at least one relationship this semester.

"I’m in love with the world through the eyes of a girl." Elliott Smith-