Here’s the letter

from the homophobic husband of ex-wife.  My commentary is in italics.  More commentary and events of this morning at the end.

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Hello:
 
Since I joined (I think he’s referring to our company – he joined after me, after he married my ex)  I have chatted about your challenges in two capacities.  Both to seek advice from my managers on how to proceed with my security concerns and in conversations that occur between friends because you and I are linked by family ties.
 
Security Conversations:  It is my opinion that you are a security risk. For many years I have reported my concerns (to whom?  certainly not the company’s security dept). The injections of estrogen may impact you psychologically (I do not know, but told my leadership) and transgendered is according to the APA and in the DSM-IV & V as a disorder.  As part of my clearences, I signed statements that if I feel there is a security risk I should report it. I take that requirement very seriously. It is my police officer training.  (Reporting concerns is one thing, fine, but conducting your own investigation is against several company policies)

 
Social Conversations:  Work colleagues who know me know that you and I have an unusual family tie.  As to which of my friends know, I honestly do not know as I have not keep a list of who knows.
 
This has been a difficult problem.  I would like to be clear I have never spoken of you or about you in a demeaning way.  My concerns are honest concerns.  The literature clearly indicates as you transition, transgendered individuals face very high levels of violence and have an increased risks of suicide (21% of male to female transsexuals attempt suicide). Consider 2003 when transgendered individuals were being randomly shot and killed in DC.  (oh, great, thanks.  How would you like it if someone huge and imposing and prone to extreme anger came up to you and said "you know, people like you are subject to random violence".  As if everyone in the trans community isn’t aware of how many hate crimes we suffer each year and how many friends we’ve lost.)

 
Also be aware that you trangender activities are known by many others.  For example the Pinewood neighborhood knows of your transition.  At my first Pinewood block party 7 years ago (which you attended) while you were playing volleyball, a neighbor asked me if I knew of your [expletive deleted] wants to transgender?  I explained I did.  (yes, ex wife spread the news far and wide after the divorce, cause she was so angry.  some of those folks are still friendly, most I don’t care to talk to)

 
When Eileen shared your schedule, I thought you might want to revisit it.  As you can see the belief that others at work or in public do not know is mistaken.
 
I hope this helps.   I wish you peace of mind as you face the many challenges coming your way.  (right, veiled threats to get my clearance pulled, and therefore unemployed, and he wishes me peace of mind.)

 
Best regards,

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Commentary:  he is right that if he feels someone is a security risk, we’re supposed to report it to our security dept. He didn’t do that, he launched his own investigation.  Being an ex cop does not give him that right or that authority. It’s not his job anymore.

Lots of things are in the DSM that are not indicative of a security risk.  Anxiety is in the DSM.  Hypochondria.  and there’s a big move right now to get GID removed from the DSM.  Did you know that the DSM used to list "homosexuality" as a disorder?  that got deleted a few years back.  Totally irrelevant point.

If he has additional "literature" that indicates that estrogen makes folks psychologically unstable, well…  yeah, I won’t go there.  And I’m not on injections, I’m on the patch. Nanny nanny boo boo.

Pinewood is the street I lived on with the ex.  When we broke up and I moved out, she told everyone on the street, and a few more too.  She claimed it was for "support" – no, she was just so mad she was out to cause me as much public embarassment as possible.  So, sure I know those folks know.  And if they’re at all decent folks, they realize that they know more because of the ex-wife’s issues than mine.  It’s like if someone runs around telling the neighborhood what positions someone likes for sex – it’s like – why are you telling me this?

His comments about "random violence" are what tipped the scales here.  He is a large, imposing, aggressive and psychologically intimidating person.  I have the psychiatrist report from ’03 that stated that my son was having anxiety attacks because of this person, and that my son was ordered to spend no more than 1 day a week at his mother’s house, and was not to be left alone with this person. 

Events of this morning:

I got that letter yesterday (Sunday).  This morning, I notified my management and HR that I felt there was a harassment situation going on against me.  We all me, I showed them the letter. They all agreed with all of my assessments.  Becuase he and I are in different parts of the company, my HR person has to raise this with her supervisors and with the HR of his part of the company.  they all agreed they need to get them in line in no uncertain terms, and I’ll be kept in the loop.  They recommended I talk to the company’s legal assistance in terms of law enforcement protection outside of the work environment.  More later.

-Jude