A Final Goodbye (But Not Forgotten)

Previous entry with Photos on my trip.

On Wed. we got up got ready and left an hour early for the Funeral home. That was so anyone wanting to view him before the funeral, and say last goodbyes could do so, so his kids wouldnt see him. They still didnt understand what was going on. Poor Carol looked so sad and so lost. She had a breakdown the night before, realizing that she didnt know something that John would have and she cried for hours. She’s still sleeping with a shirt of his she hadnt washed yet. She said she was in a state of half sleep and she felt him hugging her and she freaked out and woke up all the way and he was gone. I don’t think it was a trick of her mind, I think it was John saying goodbye to her and comforting her. Letting her know she did the right thing. I couldnt bring myself to see him in the casket so I stayed with Jim and watched the kids with Katrina and him. when the funeral started, the boys had to be taken out, not understanding that this was a memory and greivance of Johns life. They are only 4 and 6 so I don’t blame them for not knowing any better. There was a soloist who sang such beautiful songs. The pastor gave a beautiful sermon. I can now never listen to Wind Beneath My Wings, Memories from Cats, or Unchained Melody without weeping uncontrolably. The Pastor gave people a chance to talk abotu John and so many people said wonderful things about him. The most heart wrenching for me was when my cousin Jeff (38), stood to talk. He’s a little mentally handicapped, and he said “Uncle John was really cool and stuff. He was my best friend, and he always had cool stuff and toys that he would let me play with. John was really awesome and I miss him a whole bunch. I will never forget my best friend.” I couldnt help but cry harder when he spoke. It wasnt formal or thought out beforehand, but it came straight from his heart in that very moment. After the service, ten minutes later, while all his friend’s were at the after party, if you could call it that, all the family went up to his resting place for a final goodbye. Carol decided to put him in a mosuleum instead of the ground. He was put in feet first so that when she dies she can be put in the same spot with her head touching his head in her own casket. After the final goodbye, Carol asked for one more moment alone with John before he has put in his resting place, so we went back down to the gathering.

The service phamplet front.

A poem about John

Remember John Always