April 10, 2005

you held me in your hands

I had a dream about Tim the other night. That day I had this very clear image of him and me being together. It really caught me off guard how much it still hurts. I mean, chest-tightening heart-stopping screaming-wrenching pain that filled me from head to toe. Its been about 2 years. I’ve had other relationships and moved beyond it. But something made it all come rushing back and I’m back where I started off. One thing that has changed, is I don’t think I could take him back at this point. Too many things have happened, changed me and I’m sure changed him. But his utter rejection of me, and the utter betrayal he committed in those four words are still haunting me, seriously ripping me apart all over again.

Look at me
my depth perception must be off again
Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did
It has not healed with time
It just shot down my spine.
You look so beautiful tonight
Remind me how you laid us down
And gently smiled before you destroyed my life

Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart?
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces

Look at me.
My depth perception must be off again
You got much closer than I thought you did
Im in your reach
You held me in your hands

But could you find it in your heart?
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart?
To make it go away
And let me rest in pieces

Rest in Pieces ~ Saliva

was it one of those dreams when you wake up and expect it to be real and then feel like crying b/c you reailize that you just dreamed it all up? i dont like those dreams. the past hurts, and i am sorr you have been hurt, everyone has but you have had your fair share of it, >:D< well take care of yourself. ~kate

Hey sorry I haven’t written in a while I will write one here today most likely. I read this entry and it is wierd how we dream about people. I can’t say that I have ever dreamt about my ex but I do have really scary dreams about my boyfriend now and his ex getting back together and me being right there! I hate those dreams. Well I hope you are doing ok. Hope to talk to you soon. Peace and love.

I once had a girlfriend, highschool sweet heart type thing. o,she was so in love with me and she was happy, nothing could be better. we were even engaged. It was such bliss she always said. Then, one day..she came over, and broke up with me, right out of the blue. No talking bout anything wrong or anything like that. As she handed me heart, I noticed that it wasnt as red as I thought it’d be.

Not sure why I told you that…will you accept misery loves company as my reason? ANYway, freak…you haven’t updated in a long time, which is odd and weird. Is everything okay!? come put my world back on track and UPdate =) Or, at least, leave me a note Ttyl

My story follows the same as your, up until the ‘i never loved you’part. We just part ways recently, it was way to hard being friends with her annd having feelings that werent returned. Heh, the worst was when she broke up with me, she gave everything I ever gave her. jewelry, poems, etc. Dont ever do that =P…unless he asks for it =)