Watch what you wish for. It might come true.

So boys are evil and need to die. Manny pissed me off so royally on Thursday while I was at work. Twice! Once on the phone, which I let go and then online. I just got so fed up with his bullshit and I seriously lost it. Totally returned to my original male-bashing state. Dear God I pity any male who came across me then. I whipped into Manny. I almost felt bad. But I was (and still am) so fed up of biting my tongue and holding back what I want to say around him. He’s always gotta have the last word. But anyway, we had a really great nasty fight but I went to his farewell party.

Supposed to be at Michelle’s but their toliet exploded so they were at Joe’s. I went after class, but made a detour to Heathers and saw puppies, brothers and parents. Then went to party, which eventually moved to the Myers playground, (which shows you how lame we all are). And Manny and I did a finally real break-up. I can’t deal with him. The past two weeks I’ve been doing pretty good. Happy and content and not falling apart. Yah, I still have problems, but I’m breathing aren’t I? The only two major problems have been concerning Manny. So we’re just not going to talk. We’re laying off until who knows. Whenever we feel we can talk again. And I know its probably more me than him. But it feels like he trys too hard. Being friends shouldn’t be that painful and that frustrating.

Today my dad’s office got moved. Basically I did most of it because he was still at a closing, which I know was impossible to avoid. But still, I moved all his shit that he didn’t pack up like he was suppose to. And I moved it and unpacked it and set most of it up. So it seriously looked like his office already before he even got back. Then we were trying to move this bookcase cause he didn’t like it, whatever. And he kept yelling at me not to push the top. Well since my hands were touching it, that was the same, so I got yelled at and I literally broke into tears and I really didn’t know why. I wasn’t really tired. Found out later that I had my period, don’t you love being a girl?!? UCK! But I felt like all I ever do is try to please him and I just can’t. I remember once saying like I’m in an emotionally abusive relationship. He beats me and I still strive to make him happy. Why do I even bother? I guess more than anything thats what bothered me. He didn’t say thanks or nice job or anything for moving his entire fucking office. Nothing. Granted everyone else was blabbing but still, would a thank you dear hurt him? And then he screams at me while I’m trying to help. Then we got out to dinner and I stick by him trying to make him happy and love me again. It was my fault, I should have been better, more perfect. I hate feeling like that cause its bullshit and I know it. But I still catch myself doing it.

Anyway, Clint is awesome and I think I’m going to name him boy of the week. There’s a long story for you! But not now, I’m so tired its ridiculous. I’ll write more later sometime. Maybe.