patches of emotions

my emotions come in little spurts
never feeling everything I need to
never able to sort it all out
painkillers kill my emotions too
surgery performed has left me scarred
in more ways than one
i lost wisdom and friends
in one fell swoop
friends that were always my support
my last life line left
they pulled the plug
removed the laughing gas
and the pain starts to seep in at the corners
patches of emotions
that make up the blanket you surround me in
i don’t understand
you don’t understand
no one is perfectly identical
if no one understands
what is the point of friendship
if there is no point of friends
my life has lost its final meaning
boys boost their ego and testosterone
smacking the queen of hearts on their heads
she is the only one who can claim
the heart of a man purely and simply
emotions so intense i can’t feel a thing
believing that its wrong
becoming a slick piece of ice
that everything just slides off of
how does he do that?
i wonder sometimes does he even care
metallic taste of the blood in my mouth
silent phone in my pocket
reminds me of the week
i lost wisdom and friends
in one fell swoop