i used to make my parents proud

This is the darkness of my life. This is the bad side, the non-comprehendable side of me. This is where my sometimes friends fail and falter, unsure how to proceed. This is where my energy friends reach out and pour everything they’ve got at me. This is where I struggle to cling to outstretched hands, to hope. This is where I just scream and scream, waiting for the pain the pass. This is where the truth is revealed. This is where breathing becomes unbearable and cause for tears. This is where I find the dark cold truth. This is where nothing can hide. This is where light is false. This is where darkness brings the truth out. This is where I am blinded by light and focus on the dark. This is where the beast in me takes over and speaks through my mouth. This is where bitch is defined. This is where I lose acquaintances. This is where friendships are tempered by fire and their fate decided. This is where you either pass or fail. There is no half way.

There is no middle ground.

I used to be such a burning example,
I used to be so original.
I used to care, I was being careful.
Made sure I showed it to those that I love.

I used to sleep without a single stir,
‘Cause I was about my father’s work.

Well Take me out tonight,
The ship of fools I’m on will sink.
A millstone around my neck,
Be my breath, there’s nothing I wouldn’t give.

I used to pray a God was listening.
I used to make my parents proud.
I was the glue that kept my friends together,
Now they don’t talk and we don’t go out.

I used to know the name of every person I kissed.
Now I made this bed and I can’t fall asleep in it.

Take me out tonight,
The ship of fools I’m on will sink.
A millstone around my neck,
Be my breath, there’s nothing I wouldn’t give.

Throw me that lifeline,
The ship of fools I’m on will sink.
A millstone around my neck
Be my breath, there’s nothing I wouldn’t give.

Never hit the brakes
there’s no time to save him,
he’s run out in the street
anybody know his name?
I think I recognize him
sure it’s him?
… mistake

Woah.

So take me out tonight.
The ship of fools I’m on will sink.
A millstone around my neck.
Be my breath, there’s nothing I wouldn’t give.

To save my life tonight.
The ship of fools I’m on will sink
A Millstone around my neck
Be my breath, there’s nothing I wouldn’t give.

Millstone ~ Brand New