Things Are Worse

Jessica talked to Caelin.

Apparently he never said he liked me in the first place. He only likes me as a friend, as someone cool to hang out with. And now everyone knows the whole situation, I’ve embarassed myself completely, so much that I can’t handle the thought of going out to the bar with everyone tonight.

Now that I know he doesn’t like me that way I couldn’t stand to look at him. It’s too awful.

I wish I’d listened to my gut when it told me not to say anything. If I hadn’t, things would have been fine and normal and I would still have my dignity. Now all I have left is shame and embarassment.

I feel like drinking. And I’m alone. So isn’t that proper….drinking alone on a Friday night, crying.

I really would just like to know what’s wrong with me? Is there a reason why guys don’t like me?