I think I need a sun rise, im tired of the sunset.

so august is when my lease is up. august is when i will be moving out of this apartment and quiting my job and moving.. moving away. im not quite sure to where or why or how. i just know that in august this is all going to end and something new is going to begin and i will put the chapter of pittsburgh away. put it away like i did slippery rock, like i did saxonburg, south park, toms river.. so on and so fourth. some of those places i will always keep with me of course. (and some of those places haunt me in my sleep). when i announce that i am moving come august, people always ask me where to. i guess thats a good question, and my answer is always the same. ‘i’m not sure yet. where do you think i should move?’. i dont have a reason to move anywhere imparticular. except for jersey. anywhere else would just be me blindly picking a place on a map. but one thing i am pretty sure of is that i am done with pittsburgh.

i hate my job. its not one of the normal i-want-to-sleep-all-day,-and-not-work-for-the-rest-of-my-life. its more like that place brings out the worst in me. the people, the apoligizing, the smiling, the fakeness. i get so frusterated, so easily, and there is no changing it once it happens. i freak out sometimes, im a bitch to the people that i work with, and everyday i feel my sanity slowly start slipping away.

but then i just tell myself its only til august.

august.

is it august yet?