believe me that i see you in a different light

when i round that turn it always gives me a sense of relief. when the city comes in to sight i feel as though my problems are behind me. it’s nothing like that uneasy feeling of driving past campus with the memories jumping out at me from every blade of grass, every stairwell, every inch of that place.

i told him that the less i saw, the easier  it was not to care. that’s why i leave so suddenly, that’s why i don’t ask questions, i’d rather not know. ignorance is bliss when it comes to monitoring feelings toward you, towards them, towards a life i don’t miss, towards the things you dont see.

i’m 20 now and i feel the need to have more control over every situation, babying it as not to fuck things up again. not to be stupid, but to becareful. not to be emotional, but indifferent. not to find a reason, but to forget.

and always, always move on.