9/27/05

It’s not easy, recently i’ve had you on my mind. Keep trying to think of something else but you just stick like peanut butter to the roof of my mouth. Slowly my heart sinks lower south. Truth is i still miss you. The view of something grand is so far away. I should really be looking here.

How dare i start this again, rambling on about the past. It’s true my dear i have acted like an ass, but i’m sorry. My folly is i still love you. I try moving away but the closer i go the nearer the thought of you stays.  Engraved in my mind, taunting me. I’m gaunt with dpression, wrought with heart ache. I sought something else but it just wont do. All i need in my life is you.

Try not thinking about something you just can’t live with out. I doubt you could. Why would you want to? With me it’s always the same wanting something i can’t have. I’m a slave to myself. It’s bitter sweet. Im on top of the world but slipping with out you to hold me up. Thought i had it all but i have nothing without you.  Always loving something i can’t have.

It’s all a lie. better apart then together. Not the right time, right place or person. It’s time to just go on. No more tears. My fears grow waiting for life to unfold. The rest is left untold.