Teddy Bears and Evil Angels

>

Ok. Here’s a story I wrote for Sunday school class. Enjoy. It’s a mite strangish. *teehee*

There was nothing in particular about the liberally stuffed bear that sat contented on its pedestal smiling benignly at those who passed swiftly by on their way to some place. It was the same in every aspect as any that had come before down to the last unnevenly sewn stitch. However, to the wide-eyed boy who stood staring at it, his hand hanging limply in his mothers, the bear was the most wonderful thing he had ever seen. It wasn’t that he had never seen a stuffed bear before or that he didn’t have one or two of his very own. The reason this bear in particular stuck out admist all the rest was simply that it had been made by his great-grandmother. A woman he barely remembered as more than a warm smile and sand-papery lips pressed gently to his forehead. She had died when he was two although he still didn’t understand exactly what that meant except that he wouldn’t see her again for a long, long time. Although he might not have recalled her, he remembered the bears.

The house his great-grandmother had lived in had had a room that his mother called a “useless waste of space” and it had been filled with more stuffed bears than any person could know what to do with. All were made by his two times grandmother who was famous in many places for reasons the boy could not really remember. Her self-made bears were worth a lot of money as the boy well knew. Once he had asked his mother if he might have one of the bears. She had told him in no uncertain terms that unless he wanted to find himself a job somewhere there was no she was paying for “those useless scraps of fur and fluff”. His mother used the word useless a lot. Ever since his father had went away on his journey of “self-discovery”.

He stood there on that cracked and broken side-walk staring longingly up at the bear where it sat wanting it so badly he would have done anything to have it. With a jerk, he was hauled off down the street by his irritated mother who kept muttering under her breath. Another thing that had started after his father had left.

“Keep up with me now, Jacob. I don’t have time today for your useless dilly-dallying. Places to go, people to see.” She scolded him as he stumbled after her. His hand hurt where she gripped it tightly. With barely another word to him she swept through one building after another. Jacob watched curiously as his mother went from stern and determined to angry and morose. He couldn’t understand why none of the fancy people his mother went to visit seemed happy to see her. With a pride that only the very young can feel towards their parents, Jacob knew that his mother was beautiful and kind and thoughtful. At least in the presence of others. None of the finely dressed people appeared to think that however.

As his mother proceeded to get more and more tense with anger, Jacob found himself recalling the bear that had tempted him from the shop window. It glowed in his mind and he thought he could feel a warmth coming from it like his great-grandmother had made him feel. Only more intense and wonderful. He imagined himself with the bear, hugging it close to his heart to feel the special love that he knew must come from it. Muttering to herself again, Jacob let his mother fade to the background as his mind took him away to a place he called all his own.

In his dreamland, Jacob was surrounded by a hoard of fantastical creatures. They came from all kinds of stories, dragons and winged lions played together by a shimmering lake. Breaking away from the others, a unicorn came over to him and nuzzled his chest. On its back was the stuffed-bear which waved at Jacob enthusiastically. He smiled as he plucked it from the unicorns back and held it close.

“Jacob!” A shrill voice cut through Jacobs pleasant day dreaming. He looked up at his mother as she glared down at him. They were home he realized and he had been standing dreamily in the living room for a while. He smiled at her still feeling comforted by his dream. She sighed and stomped over to the couch throwing herself down on it with a careless flop.

“Go to your room. I have a headache. I don’t want to see you until tomarro.” She announced with a flick of her wrist motioning him towards the back hall. It was early in the evening, the fading light of the sun slanted softly across Jacobs face as he stared at his mother.

“Well?” She demanded glaring at him again.

“I’m hungry.” In response to this statement his stomach let out a tiny grumble of complaint.

“Go get something yourself.” She snarled at him closing her eyes as if that would make him go away. One of her hands came up to press gently at her temples. Jacob bit his lip before shuffling slowly towards the kitchen. Opening the refigerator he was met by the empty blankness of white food-stained walls and a light that flickered, waiting to die. Another night without food. It had happened a few times before his father had left but now it seemed to happen almost on a regular basis. He sighed and tramped down the hall to his room.

Entering his room he almost wasn’t surprised to see something red sitting casually on his small dresser. He closed the door behind him quietly but didn’t turn on the light. The one window in his room illumnated every corner with the sun’s faded glory. Crossing the small space slowly, Jacob side-stepped his way towards his tiny bed. It didn’t move but twin spots of fire followed his every step as he sat slowly and crawled back until he was supported by the wall behind him. He sat there staring at it for a long time.

“Who are you?” Jacob whispered into the almost darkness. The thing shifted and a pointed tail fell to dangle over the edge of the dresser. Cloven feet joined the tail a moment later as the creature straightened itself out; a delicate pair of horns curled above a small face which was pointed and mischevious. In its hands a trident was loosely grasped and it was grinning at Jacob in unrestrained glee.

“Why boy, don’t you know me?” The little creature asked. It was actually a little shorter than Jacob.

“You look like what gramma said Satan looks like.” Jacob replied truthfully. The little creature seemed to puff up at his words looking smug.

“That’s me alright. Just popped in for a visit.” Satan said cheerily, twirling his tail with his free hand and swinging his legs. Jacob scrunched his face up in confusion.

“But aren’t you evil?” Jacob used the word his grandmother had but didn’t really understand exactly what it meant. Only that the little red man was bad and not someone his grandmother would want him talking to.

“Sure, sure. That’s not necesarily a bad thing is it?” Satan inquired jumping down off the dresser doing a little flip.

“Um…I guess not.” Jacob said although he wasn’t sure what Satan was talking about. He watched silently as the little red man ran quickly around the room brandishing his trident. There was a manic energy that surrounded Satan as he raced from one side to the other almost faster then Jacob could see. At last he halted at the side of the bed and smiled up at Jacob.

“There you go then. So what can I do for you? Anything you want, I can get it for you.” Satan offered. He stood silent and still while Jacob thought about what he’d said.

“I want money.” Jacob said at last. If he had money then he could buy that bear, a last link to his great-grandmother. Nothing else mattered as much to him at that moment, not even food.

“Good, good. How much?” Satan started rocking back and forth humming softly to himself.

“One-hundred dollars.” Jacob said knowing it was a lot of money. He remembered the price quite clearly his mother having shouted it at the top of her lungs repeatedly the one time he had asked her for it. There hadn’t been any supper that night either or the next night.

“Okey-dokey. Sit tight kiddo.” Satan said happily, closing his eyes. He waved his trident around in the air and started muttering in some archaic tongue. Jacob was fascinated by the display and edged closer to the little red man.

“Here you go.” Satan opened his eyes and handed Jacob a single bill. It had that crisp freshness that told Jacob it was new, that it had never been used before. He touched it reverently and held it close to his face so that he could breath in its newness.

“Thank you.” Jacob whispered his eyes filling with tears.

“Now I will expect you to pay that back, sport.” Satan admonished.

“How? I don’t have money?” Jacob felt his dreams starting to fade away.

“Now, now. No need to worry your pretty little head about it. It’s simple really. All you have to do is give me your wonderful little dreams.” Satan explained with a shrug of his shoulders.

“My dreams?” Jacob was perplexed and a little scared. His dreams were the only things that his mother could not take away from him when he was bad. They let him remember his great-grandmothers smile and the way his mother used to be back before the screaming had started, before the hungry nights and the lonely days. Was the bear really worth that much. Really?

“Of course its worth it, sonny boy. What do you want them dreams for anyway? There a “useless waste of time” right? It’ll make your mother happier. And you’ll always have the little cuddly bear to keep you company. Am I right?” Satan danced from cloven foot to cloven foot his tail whipping this way and that, this way and that. Jacob found himself mesmerized by the swishing sound it made, hardly paying attention to the words rolling out of the pointy mouth.

“Okay.” Jacob found the word slipping off his tongue before he could stop it. The little man laughed in delight and snapped his fingers.

“Wonderful doing business with you, buddy boy.” Satan disappeared with a silent puff of red smoke leaving Jacob alone with just a crisp bill and an empty ache in his heart. Ignoring the dull pain, Jacob stared at the bill feeling an increased excitement. He was going to get his bear. That was the thought ringing through his mind as he dropped into a restless sleep.

When he woke the next morning he felt a vague disquiet in the back of his mind. He stared at the bill that lay innocently on his bed where he had lain next to it all night. A little of the excitement returned but he was also concerned. He didn’t know how he was going to buy the bear. His mother would never let him leave the house by himself and he had no idea how to get to the store anyway. It struck him then that he would have to ask her to help him. He hoped she was in a better mood that day as he wandered out of his room with the bill clentched tightly in his fist. It crinckled in a very satisfying way.

“Momma?” He spoke softly to the woman who sat morosely at the kitchen table. She turned to stare at him hers eyes immediatly keying in on the green that was in his fist.

“What?” She replied looking at him curiously.

He slowly held out the bill to her. She stared at it in shock for a moment before snatching it out of his hands and shreiking.

“Where did you get this?! Never mind, I don’t care. It’s a miracle. I was just wondering how I was going to pay for the heating bill when you hand me the answer.” She crowed getting up and dancing around the kitchen in her joy. Jacob tugged urgently at her sleeve. Stopping in mid step she smiled down at him.

“Momma, can you get me great-gramma’s bear? Please?” Jacob pleaded looking up at her hopefully. She waved her hand in the air absently.

“Sure. Whatever Jacob. Now go play in your room.” She dismissed him already talking to herself under her breath. A sense of loss overcame Jacob as he sat down on his bed. She wasn’t going to get the bear for him, it had been a stupid thing to do. He felt helpless as he stared at the wall.

“Maddie’s going to stay with you for a bit while I go take care of a few things Jacob. Be good.” Jacobs mother called as she slammed the front door shut behind her. He could her his mothers friend puttering around in the kitchen. He knew she wouldn’t bother him while she was there. His mothers friends never bothered him, in fact they ignored him. It didn’t matter to Jacob though, all he had to do was vanish into one of his dreams and everything was alright.

Except now he couldn’t. No matter how hard he tried he could not envision the magical land where the dragon and the winged lion played by the shimmering lake and the unicorn waited to carry him to far away places. It wasn’t there in his mind nor his heart. He felt empty, flat. There wasn’t even a stuffed bear to squeeze for comfort. Jacob curled into a ball on his bed and started crying. It didn’t make him feel better but he didn’t know what else to do.

A long time passed before his tears stopped and he lay there with an ache in his stomach to match the one in his chest. He sniffled but made no move to get up. Even when the door to his room opened he didn’t budge, but when a soft, plushy object was thrust into his arms he sat up so quickly his head spun for a moment.

“I know its not what you wanted, but it was the best I could do. Here.” His mother handed him a burger. Jacob looked at her blankly for a moment before mechanically taking bites of the meat. The stuffed bear lay limply across his lap. It was old and worn with an eye missing. He knew instantly that it had come from a thrift store near where they lived. Someone else had given it up after it had started to fall apart. Now Jacob was stuck with a bear that someone else had loved and talked to and cherished. Some of the burger seemed to stick in his throat and he had to force it down.

“Thanks momma.” Jacob murmured sadly. She didn’t seem to notice but ruffled his hair and left the room.

Swallowing the last bite, Jacob stared at the bear again. It wasn’t any better the second time he looked at it. He sighed and picked it up. It wouldn’t hurt anything to hug it. Bringing the bear close to his heart, Jacob closed his eyes and tried to feel the warm, loving feeling that he knew was there somewhere. Nothing. Sighing again, he tossed the bear to the foot of his bed and tried not to start crying.

As the days passed, Jacob started to feel the loss of his dreams more truly than he had before. The aching in his chest grew until his whole body was filled with a dull throbbing pain. He could no longer retreat from reality when things became unbearable; he had to deal with the hurt and the pain. It became so bad that he was silent to avoid his mother yelling at him. She liked his changed attitude and smiled more often at his seeming obediance. If he was no longer quite as happy as he had been before and

if he didn’t have nearly as much energy as before that was all to the better as far as she was concerned.

There was only one thing that upset Jacob more than the loss of his dreams. It was the thing he had gotten in return, the bear. Which still sat where he had thrown it, laying dejectedly at the foot of his bed. Every day when he woke he would stare at it before getting up to start his day and every day the little bubble of hatred would grow inside him. The price that that worn and tattered bear had cost him was more than he could bare.

“I hate you.” He would whisper at it every morning as he got dressed. It lay there staring sadly back at him with its one, lonely eye.

Jacob even started to hate the bear that he had first coveted. Sometimes when he was out with his mother they would pass by the window were the bear sat on its pedestal. He started to glare at whenever he saw it. If he had never wanted it so bad, he would still have his dreams. He knew then that there was no loving warmth in his great-grandmothers bear, that even if he had it he would not be comforted. The thing he wanted most was the dreams which had been taken from him.

“Mamma?” Jacob asked his mother one day when he couldn’t take it anymore.

“What?” She was not quite as annoyed as she might have been. Jacob didn’t ask her things very often anymore.

“If Satan takes something from you, how do you get him to give it back?” Jacob looked at his feet as he asked. He hoped she wouldn’t start yelling at him.

“Well, ask God I suppose. Or an angel. I guess.” She shrugged as if that was it. Jacob waited but she didn’t offer anything else.

“How do you get them to help?” Jacob felt his curiousity peaked. His grandmother had told him about angels too. She had told him they were awesome beings with billowing white wings and voices like thunder and they did the will of God.

“Pray I suppose. Like grandma.” She said absently waving her hand at him to shoo him away. He retreated to his room deep in thought. He remembered his grandmother, the one who had told him about God and Satan, praying with him for his parents. It hadn’t helped then but maybe now it would. There was nothing else for him to do. He got down on his knees beside his bed and bowed his head holding his hands in front of him like he remembered.

“Dear God, I know I haven’t talked to you like gramma showed me, but I’m sorry. Please help me. Please send one of your angels to get my dreams back for me. Satan took them. Please get them back from him…ummm..I guess that’s all. Oh! I almost forgot. Please protect momma and pappa and everyone else. Amen.” Jacob whispered fervently. His whole body trembled with the strength of his desire to have his dreams back. When he stood and climbed into bed his body still trembled but as he lay there a kind of peace settled over him and he drifted off to a dreamless sleep.

When he woke the next morning there was a boy sitting at the foot of the bed staring at him. Jacob sat up slowly as the other boys dark eyes watched him intently. The discarded bear was held gently in the boys small hands. It was still early in the morning and the harsh light pierced into Jacobs room from his opened door. He tried to shield his eyes against the glare so he could look more closely at the stranger. It seemed like he was giving off a glow of his own.

“Who are you?” Jacob questioned trying to keep his voice low, his mother still abed.

“You called me. My name is Ladon.” His voice was soft and sweet not at all like thunder.

“Your an angel?” Jacob asked confused. His grandmother had never mentioned angels that were as young as him. There were no wings either.

“As you like. I’m here to help you.” Ladon continued to cuddle the bear in his arms. Jacob sat forward eagerly.

“You can get my dreams back?” He felt excited for the first time since Satan had visited him. If this strange boy angel really could help him he would never want for anything that bad again. He would accept what was given to him, he would accept that his father might never come back. He would even try to mind his mother more.

“Yes. Although it will cost you.” Ladon replied smiling in a way that was supposed to be reassuring but only made Jacob anxious. He would have to give up something else to have his dreams returned to him. It wasn’t fair.

“What?” Jacob muttered. He really didn’t want to know. Maybe it would be worth it to have his dreams back. Maybe.

“This bear.” Ladon held up the bear in his arms and Jacob stared at him, amazed.

“Sure. Take it. Just get my dreams back for me. Please.” There was a moment of silence as Jacob and Ladon stared at each other.

“You’re positive?” Ladon demanded. He sat, his body tense, as if the answer was of great importance.

“Yes. Take it.” Jacob dismissed the worn bear much the way his mother would him. A smile melted the tension from Ladon and he nodded his head.

“Here.” Ladon said holding his hand out. Hesitantly, Jacob reached forward until he grasped it. A shock went up his arm the moment they touched and Jacob jerked his hand away. Something creeped into the vacant hole in his heart filling him with a steady warmth. Jacob smiled hearing the distant whicker of his unicorn and the muted roar of a lion.

“Something else.” The soft voice cut through Jacobs happiness. There were two bears sitting in Ladons lap. One was worn and tattered, the other was soft looking and new.

“It’s yours.” Ladon said handing Jacob the new bear. Jacob could hardly believe it as his hands closed around the object he had so craved. Closing his eyes and with trembling hands, Jacob brought the bear close to his heart and squeezed. A warmth enveloped him in a tight cocoon that had him delirious with happiness. He would have stayed that way a bit longer but he remembered something and opened his eyes starting to speak.

There was no boy sitting calmly at the end of his bed. He had gone taking the other worn bear with him. Jacob shrugged not really caring about the other bear but wishing he could have thanked the angel. Instead he bowed his head over his new bear.

“Dear God, thank you for sending an angel to help. I will be good for momma. I promise. And I’ll come to you next time I need help. Amen.” Jacob whispered hugging his bear to him. His mother never noticed that the bear she had given him was no longer quite the same as it had been before, but as long as he minded her what did it matter.

~The Black Mage stirs

</DIV